November 15 Sexual Encounter
Ms. Lewinsky testified that Wednesday, November 15, 1995 - the second day of the government shutdown - marked the beginning of her sexual relationship with the President. At one point, Ms. Lewinsky and the President talked alone in the Chief of Staff's office. In the course of flirting with him, she raised her jacket in the back and showed him the straps of her thong underwear, which extended above her pants.
En route to the restroom at about 8 pm, she passed George Stephanopoulos's office. The President was inside alone, and he beckoned her to enter. She told him that she had a crush on him. He laughed, then asked if she would like to see his private office. Through a connecting door in Mr. Stephan-opoulos's office, they went through the President's private dining room towards the study off the Oval Office. Ms. Lewinsky testified: "We talked briefly and sort of acknowledged that there had been a chemistry that was there before and that we were both attracted to each other and then he asked me if he could kiss me."
According to Ms. Lewinsky, she and the President kissed. She unbuttoned her jacket; either she unhooked her bra or he lifted her bra up; and he touched her breasts with his hands and mouth. Ms. Lewinsky testified: "I believe he took a phone call...and so we moved from the hallway into the back office ...He put his hand down my pants and stimulated me manually in the genital area." While the President continued talking on the phone (Ms. Lewinsky understood that the caller was a Member of Congress or a Senator), she performed oral sex on him. He finished his call, and, a moment later, told Ms. Lewinsky to stop. In her recollection: "I told him that I wanted...to complete that. And he said...that he needed to wait until he trusted me more. And then I think he made a joke...that he hadn't had that in a long time."
November 17 Sexual Encounter
According to Ms. Lewinsky, she and the President had a second sexual encounter two days later, on Friday, November 17. She was at the White House until 8.56 p.m., then returned from 9.38 to 10.39 p.m. Ms. Lewinsky testified that she and the President went into the area of the private study, according to Ms. Lewinsky. There, either in the hallway or the bathroom, she and the President kissed. After a few minutes, in Ms. Lewinsky's recollection, she told him that she needed to get back to her desk. The President suggested that she bring him some slices of pizza. A few minutes later, she returned to the Oval Office area with pizza. Ms. Lewinsky testified that she and the President had a sexual encounter during this visit. They kissed, and the President touched Ms. Lewinsky's bare breasts with his hands and mouth. At some point, Betty Currie (Clinton's secretary) approached the door leading to the hallway, which was ajar, and said that the President had a telephone call. Ms. Lewinsky recalled that the caller was a Member of Congress with a nickname.While the President was on the telephone, according to Ms. Lewinsky, "he unzipped his pants and exposed himself," and she performed oral sex. Again, he stopped her before he ejaculated.
December 31 Sexual Encounter
According to Ms. Lewinsky, she and the President had their third sexual encounter on New Year's Eve. Ms. Lewinsky - by then a member of the staff of the Office of Legislative Affairs - was at the White House on Sunday, December 31, 1995, until 1.16 p.m. Sometime between noon and 1 p.m., in Ms. Lewinsky's recollection, she was in the pantry area of the President's private dining room talking with a White House steward, Bayani Nelvis. She told Mr. Nelvis that she had recently smoked her first cigar, and he offered to give her one of the President's cigars. Just then, the President came down the hallway from the Oval Office and saw Ms. Lewinsky. The President dispatched Mr. Nelvis to deliver something to Mr. Panetta.
According to Ms. Lewinsky, they moved to the study. "And then . . . we were kissing and he lifted my sweater and exposed my breasts and was fondling them with his hands and with his mouth." She performed oral sex. Once again, he stopped her before he ejaculated because, Ms. Lewinsky testified, "he didn't know me well enough or he didn't trust me yet."
January 7 Sexual Encounter
According to Ms. Lewinsky, she and the President had another sexual encounter on Sunday, January 7, According to Ms. Lewinsky, the President telephoned her early that afternoon. It was the first time he had called her at home. In her recollection: "I asked him what he was doing and he said he was going to be going into the office soon. I said, oh, do you want some company? And he said, oh, that would be great." Ms. Lewinsky went to her office, and the President called to arrange their rendezvous:
We made an arrangement that ... he would have the door to his office open, and I would pass by the office with some papers and then . . . he would sort of stop me and invite me in. So, that was exactly what happened. I passed by and that was actually when I saw [Secret Service Uniformed Officer] Lew Fox who was on duty outside the Oval Office, and stopped and spoke with Lew for a few minutes, and then the President came out and said, oh, hey, Monica . . . come on in . . . .
Ms. Lewinsky testified that during this bathroom encounter, she and the President kissed, and he touched her bare breasts with his hands and his mouth. The President "was talking about performing oral sex on me," according to Ms. Lewinsky. But she stopped him because she was menstruating and he did not. Ms. Lewinsky did perform oral sex on him.
Afterwards, she and the President moved to the Oval Office and talked. According to Ms. Lewinsky: "He was chewing on a cigar. And then he had the cigar in his hand and he was kind of looking at the cigar in . . . sort of a naughty way. And so . . . I looked at the cigar and I looked at him and I said, we can do that, too, some time."
January 21 Sexual Encounter
On Sunday, January 21, 1996, according to Ms. Lewinsky, she and the President had another sexual encounter. Oval Office at 3.33 p.m. and remained there until 7.40 p.m. On that day, according to Ms. Lewinsky, she saw the President in a hallway by an elevator, and he invited her to the Oval Office.According to Ms. Lewinsky: "We had . . . had phone sex for the first time the week prior, and I was feeling a little bit insecure about whether he had liked it or didn't like it . . . . I didn't know if this was sort of developing into some kind of a longer-term relationship than what I thought it initially might have been, that maybe he had some regular girlfriend who was furloughed."
According to Ms. Lewinsky, she questioned the President about his interest in her. "I asked him why he doesn't ask me any questions about myself, and . . . is this just about sex . . or do you have some interest in trying to get to know me as a person?" The President laughed and said, according to Ms. Lewinsky, that "he cherishes the time that he had with me."
They continued talking as they went to the hallway by the study. Then, with Ms. Lewinsky in mid-sentence, "he just started kissing me." He lifted her top and touched her breasts with his hands and mouth. According to Ms. Lewinsky, the President "unzipped his pants and sort of exposed himself," and she performed oral sex.
At one point during the encounter, someone entered the Oval Office. In Ms. Lewinsky's recollection, "[The President] zipped up real quickly and went out and came back in . . . . I just remember laughing because he had walked out there and he was visibly aroused, and I just thought it was funny."
February 4 Sexual Encounter On Sunday, February 4, according to Ms. Lewinsky, she and the President had their sixth sexual encounter and their first lengthy and personal conversation.
They walked together to the area of the private study. There, according to Ms. Lewinsky, they kissed. She was wearing a long dress that buttoned from the neck to the ankles. "And he unbuttoned my dress and he unhooked my bra, and sort of took the dress off my shoulders and . . . moved the bra . . . He was looking at me and touching me and telling me how beautiful I was." He touched her breasts with his hands and his mouth, and touched her genitals, first through underwear and then directly. She performed oral sex on him.
After their sexual encounter, the President and Ms. Lewinsky sat and talked in the Oval Office for about 45 minutes. Ms. Lewinsky thought the President might be responding to her suggestion during their previous meeting about "trying to get to know me." It was during that conversation on February 4, according to Ms. Lewinsky, that their friendship started to blossom. President's Day (February 19). Break-up
According to Ms. Lewinsky, the President terminated their relationship (only temporarily, as it happened), on Monday, February 19, 1996. In Ms. Lewinsky's recollection, the President telephoned her at her Watergate apartment that day. From the tone of his voice, she could tell something was wrong. She asked to come see him, but he said he did not know how long he would be there. The President told her that he no longer felt right about their intimate relationship, and he had to put a stop to it. Ms. Lewinsky was welcome to continue coming to visit him, but only as a friend. He hugged her but would not kiss her.
After the break-up on February 19, 1996, according to Ms. Lewinsky, "there continued to sort of be this flirtation . . . when we'd see each other." After passing Ms. Lewinsky in a hallway one night in late February or March, the President telephoned her at home and said he was disappointed that, because she had already left the White House for the evening, they could not get together. Ms. Lewinsky testified that the call "sort of implied to me that he was interested in starting up again." On March 10, 1996, Ms. Lewinsky took a visiting friend, Natalie Ungvari, to the White House. They bumped into the President, who said to Ms. Ungvari when Ms. Lewinsky introduced them: "You must be her friend from California." Ms. Ungvari was "shocked" that the President knew where she was from.
Ms. Lewinsky testified that on Friday, March 29, 1996, she was walking down a hallway when she passed the President, who was wearing the first necktie she had given him. She asked where he had got the tie, and he replied: "Some girl with style gave it to me." Later, he telephoned her at her desk and asked if she would like to see a movie. His plan was that she would position herself in the hallway by the White House Theater at a certain time, and he would invite her to join him and a group of guests as they entered. Ms. Lewinsky responded that she did not want people to think she was lurking around the West Wing uninvited. She asked if they could arrange a rendezvous over the weekend instead, and he said he would try. Records confirm that the President spent the evening of March 29 in the White House Theater. Mrs. Clinton was in Athens, Greece.
March 31 Sexual Encounter
On Sunday, March 31, 1996, according to Ms. Lewinsky, she and the President resumed their sexual contact. Ms. Lewinsky was at the White House from 10.21 a.m. to 4.27 p.m. on that day. The President was in the Oval Office from 3.00 to 5.46 p.m. His only call while in the Oval Office was from 3.06 to 3.07 p.m. Mrs. Clinton was in Ireland.
According to Ms. Lewinsky, the President telephoned her at her desk and suggested that she come to the Oval Office on the pretext of delivering papers to him. She went to the Oval Office and was admitted by a plainclothes Secret Service agent. In her folder was a gift for the President, a Hugo Boss tie.
In the hallway by the study, the President and Ms. Lewinsky kissed. On this occasion, according to Ms. Lewinsky, "he focused on me pretty exclusively," kissing her bare breasts and fondling her genitals.(273) At one point, the President inserted a cigar into Ms. Lewinsky's vagina, then put the cigar in his mouth and said: "It tastes good."(274) After they were finished, Ms. Lewinsky left the Oval Office and walked through the Rose Garden.(275)
IV. April 1996: Ms. Lewinsky's Transfer to the Pentagon
With White House and Secret Service employees remarking on Ms. Lewinsky's frequent presence in the West Wing, a deputy chief of staff ordered Ms. Lewinsky transferred from the White House to the Pentagon. On April 7 - Easter Sunday - Ms. Lewinsky told the President of her dismissal. He promised to bring her back after the election, and they had a sexual encounter.
A. Earlier Observations of Ms. Lewinsky in the West Wing
Ms. Lewinsky's visits to the Oval Office area had not gone unnoticed. Officer Fox testified that "it was pretty commonly known that she did frequent the West Wing on the weekends."(276) Another Secret Service uniformed officer, William Ludtke III, once saw her exit from the pantry near the Oval Office; she seemed startled and possibly embarrassed to be spotted.(277) Officer John Muskett testified that "if the President was known to be coming into the Diplomatic Reception Room, a lot of times [Ms. Lewinsky] just happened to be walking down the corridor, you know, maybe just to see the President."(278) Ms. Lewinsky acknowledged that she tried to position herself to see the President.(279)
Although they could not date them precisely, Secret Service officers and agents testified about several occasions when Ms. Lewinsky and the President were alone in the Oval Office. William C. Bordley, a former member of the Presidential Protective Detail, testified that in late 1995 or early 1996, he stopped Ms. Lewinsky outside the Oval Office because she did not have her pass.(280) The President opened the Oval Office door, indicated to Agent Bordley that Ms. Lewinsky's presence was all right, and ushered Ms. Lewinsky into the Oval Office.(281) Agent Bordley saw Ms. Lewinsky leave about half an hour later.(282)
Another former member of the Presidential Protective Detail, Robert C. Ferguson, testified that one Saturday in winter, the President told him that he was expecting "some staffers."(283) A short time later, Ms. Lewinsky arrived and said that "[t]he President needs me."(284) Agent Ferguson announced Ms. Lewinsky and admitted her to the Oval Office.(285) About 10 or 15 minutes later, Agent Ferguson rotated to a post on the Colonnade outside the Oval Office.(286) He glanced through the window into the Oval Office and saw the President and Ms. Lewinsky go through the door leading toward the private study.(287)
Deeming her frequent visits to the Oval Office area a "nuisance," one Secret Service Officer complained to Evelyn Lieberman, the Deputy Chief of Staff for Operations.(288) Ms. Lieberman was already aware of Ms. Lewinsky. In December 1995, according to Ms. Lewinsky, Ms. Lieberman chided her for being in the West Wing and told her that interns are not permitted around the Oval Office. Ms. Lewinsky (who had begun her Office of Legislative Affairs job) told Ms. Lieberman that she was not an intern anymore. After expressing surprise that Ms. Lewinsky had been hired, Ms. Lieberman said she must have Ms. Lewinsky confused with someone else.(289) Ms. Lieberman confirmed that she reprimanded Ms. Lewinsky, whom she considered "what we used to call a 'clutch' . . . always someplace she shouldn't be."(290)
In Ms. Lewinsky's view, some White House staff members seemed to think that she was to blame for the President's evident interest in her:
[P]eople were wary of his weaknesses, maybe, and . . . they didn't want to look at him and think that he could be responsible for anything, so it had to all be my fault . . . I was stalking him or I was making advances towards him.(292)
B. Decision to Transfer Ms. Lewinsky
Ms. Lieberman testified that, because Ms. Lewinsky was so persistent in her efforts to be near the President, "I decided to get rid of her."(293) First she consulted Chief of Staff Panetta. According to Mr. Panetta, Ms. Lieberman told him about a woman on the staff who was "spending too much time around the West Wing." Because of "the appearance that it was creating," Ms. Lieberman proposed to move her out of the White House. Mr. Panetta - who testified that he valued Ms. Lieberman's role as "a tough disciplinarian" and "trusted her judgment" - replied, "Fine."(294) Although Ms. Lieberman said she could not recall having heard any rumors linking the President and Ms. Lewinsky, she acknowledged that "the President was vulnerable to these kind of rumors . . . yes, yes, that was one of the reasons" for moving Ms. Lewinsky out of the White House.(295)
Most people understood that the principal reason for Ms. Lewinsky's transfer was her habit of hanging around the Oval Office and the West Wing.(297) White House officials arranged for Ms. Lewinsky to get another job in the Administration.(299) "Our direction is to make sure she has a job in an Agency,"
Ms. Lewinsky's Notification of Her Transfer
On Friday, April 5, 1996, Timothy Keating, Staff Director for Legislative Affairs, informed Ms. Lewinsky that she would have to leave her White House job.(304) According to Mr. Keating, he told her that she was not being fired, merely "being given a different opportunity." Ms. Lewinsky burst into tears and asked if there was any way for her to stay in the White House, even without pay.(306) No, Mr. Keating said. According to Ms. Lewinsky, "He told me I was too sexy to be working in the East Wing and that this job at the Pentagon where I'd be writing press releases was a sexier job."(307)
Conversations with the President about Her Transfer
1. Easter Telephone Conversations and Sexual Encounter
On Easter Sunday, April 7, 1996, Ms. Lewinsky told the President of her dismissal and they had a sexual encounter. Ms. Lewinsky entered the White House at 4:56 and left at 5:28 p.m. The President was in the Oval Office all afternoon, from 2:21 to 7:48 p.m.
At the White House, according to Ms. Lewinsky, she told Secret Service Officer Muskett that she needed to deliver papers to the President.(313) Officer Muskett admitted her to the Oval Office, and she and the President proceeded to the private study.(314)
According to Ms. Lewinsky, the President seemed troubled about her upcoming departure from the White House:
He told me that he thought that my being transferred had something to do with him and that he was upset. He said, "Why do they have to take you away from me? I trust you." And then he told me - he looked at me and he said, "I promise you if I win in November I'll bring you back like that."(315)
He also indicated that she could have any job she wanted after the election.(316) In addition, the President said he would find out why Ms. Lewinsky was transferred and report back to her
Ms. Lewinsky, when asked if the President had said that he would bring her back to the White House only if she did a good job at the Pentagon, responded: "No."(319)
After this Easter Sunday conversation, the President and Ms. Lewinsky had a sexual encounter in the hallway, according to Ms. Lewinsky.(320) She testified that the President touched her breasts with his mouth and hands.(321) According to Ms. Lewinsky: "I think he unzipped [his pants] . . . because it was sort of this running joke that I could never unbutton his pants, that I just had trouble with it."(322) Ms. Lewinsky performed oral sex. The President did not ejaculate in her presence.(323)
During this encounter, someone called out from the Oval Office that the President had a phone call.(324) He went back to the Oval Office for a moment, then took the call in the study. The President indicated that Ms. Lewinsky should perform oral sex while he talked on the phone, and she obliged.(325) The telephone conversation was about politics, and Ms. Lewinsky thought the caller might be Dick Morris.(326) White House records confirm that the President had one telephone call during Ms. Lewinsky's visit: from "Mr. Richard Morris," to whom he talked from 5:11 to 5:20 p.m.(327)
A second interruption occurred a few minutes later, according to Ms. Lewinsky. She and the President were in the study.(328) Ms. Lewinsky testified:
Harold Ickes has a very distinct voice and . . . I heard him holler "Mr. President," and the President looked at me and I looked at him and he jetted out into the Oval Office and I panicked and . . . thought that maybe because Harold was so close with the President that they might just wander back there and the President would assume that I knew to leave.(329)
Ms. Lewinsky testified that she exited hurriedly through the dining room door.(330) That evening, the President called and asked Ms. Lewinsky why she had run off. "I told him that I didn't know if he was going to be coming back . . . . [H]e was a little upset with me that I left."(331)
2. April 12-13: Telephone Conversations
Ms. Lewinsky testified that the President telephoned her the following Friday, April 12, 1996, at home. They talked for about 20 minutes. According to Ms. Lewinsky, the President said he had checked on the reason for her transfer:
[H]e had come to learn . . . that Evelyn Lieberman had sort of spearheaded the transfer, and that she thought he was paying too much attention to me and I was paying too much attention to him and that she didn't necessarily care what happened after the election but everyone needed to be careful before the election.(343)
V. April-December 1996: No Private Meetings
After Ms. Lewinsky began her Pentagon job on April 16, 1996, she had no further physical contact with the President for the remainder of the year. She and the President spoke by phone (and had phone sex) but saw each other only at public functions. Ms. Lewinsky grew frustrated after the election because the President did not bring her back to work at the White House.
A. Pentagon Job
On April 16, 1996, Ms. Lewinsky began working at the Pentagon as Confidential Assistant to the Assistant Secretary of Defense for Public Affairs.(350)
B. No Physical Contact
According to Ms. Lewinsky, she had no physical contact with the President for the rest of 1996.(351) "I wasn't alone with him so when I saw him it was in some sort of event or group setting," she testified.(352)
C. Telephone Conversations
According to Ms. Lewinsky, the President telephoned her at about 6:30 a.m. on July 19, the day he was leaving for the 1996 Olympics in Atlanta, and they had phone sex, after which the President exclaimed, "[G]ood morning!" and then said: "What a way to start a day."(357)
Ms. Lewinsky and the President also talked about their relationship. During a phone conversation on September 5, according to Ms. Lewinsky, she told the President that she wanted to have intercourse with him. He responded that he could not do so because of the possible consequences. The two of them argued, and he asked if he should stop calling her. No, she responded.(364)
Ms Lewinsky's frustrations
Ms. Lewinsky grew increasingly frustrated over her relationship with President Clinton.(377) One friend understood that Ms. Lewinsky complained to the President about not having seen each other privately for months, and he replied, "Every day can't be sunshine."(378) In email to another friend in early 1997, Ms. Lewinsky wrote: "I just don't understand what went wrong, what happened? How could he do this to me? Why did he keep up contact with me for so long and now nothing, now when we could be together?"(379)
VI. Early 1997: Resumption of Sexual Encounters
In 1997, President Clinton and Ms. Lewinsky had further private meetings, which now were arranged by Betty Currie, the President's secretary. After the taping of the President's weekly radio address on February 28, the President and Ms. Lewinsky had a sexual encounter. On March 24, they had what proved to be their final sexual encounter. Throughout this period, Ms. Lewinsky continued to press for a job at the White House, to no avail.
B. Valentine's Day Advertisement
On February 14, 1997, the Washington Post published a Valentine's Day "Love Note" that Ms. Lewinsky had placed. The ad said:
With love's light wings did
I o'er perch these walls
For stony limits cannot hold love out,
And what love can do that dares love attempt.
- Romeo and Juliet 2:2
Happy Valentine's Day.
C. February 24 Message
On February 24, Ms. Lewinsky visited the White House on Pentagon business.In the study, according to Ms. Lewinsky, the President "started to say something to me and I was pestering him to kiss me, because . . . it had been a long time since we had been alone."(436) The President told her to wait a moment, as he had presents for her.(437) As belated Christmas gifts, he gave her a hat pin and a special edition of Walt Whitman's Leaves of Grass.(438)
Ms. Lewinsky described the Whitman book as "the most sentimental gift he had given me . . . it's beautiful and it meant a lot to me."(439) During this visit, according to Ms. Lewinsky, the President said he had seen her Valentine's Day message in the Washington Post, and he talked about his fondness for "Romeo and Juliet."(440)
Ms. Lewinsky testified that after the President gave her the gifts, they had a sexual encounter:
[W]e went back over by the bathroom in the hallway, and we kissed. We were kissing and he unbuttoned my dress and fondled my breasts with my bra on, and then took them out of my bra and was kissing them and touching them with his hands and with his mouth.
And then I think I was touching him in his genital area through his pants, and I think I unbuttoned his shirt and was kissing his chest. And then . . . I wanted to perform oral sex on him . . . and so I did. And then . . . I think he heard something, or he heard someone in the office. So, we moved into the bathroom.
And I continued to perform oral sex and then he pushed me away, kind of as he always did before he came, and then I stood up and I said . . . I care about you so much; . . . I don't understand why you won't let me . . . make you come; it's important to me; I mean, it just doesn't feel complete, it doesn't seem right.(441)
Ms. Lewinsky testified that she and the President hugged, and "he said he didn't want to get addicted to me, and he didn't want me to get addicted to him." They looked at each other for a moment.(442) Then, saying that "I don't want to disappoint you," the President consented.(443) For the first time, she performed oral sex through completion.(444)
When Ms. Lewinsky next took the navy blue Gap dress from her closet to wear it, she noticed stains near one hip and on the chest.(445) FBI Laboratory tests revealed that the stains are the President's semen.(446)
E. March 29 Sexual Encounter
According to Ms. Lewinsky, she had what proved to be her final sexual encounter with the President on Saturday, March 29, 1997. Records show that she was at the White House from 2:03 to 3:16 p.m., admitted by Ms. Currie.(450) The President was in the Oval Office during this period (he left shortly after Ms. Lewinsky did, at 3:24 p.m.), and he did not have any phone calls during her White House visit.(451)
According to Ms. Lewinsky, Ms. Currie arranged the meeting after the President said by telephone that he had something important to tell her. At the White House, Ms. Currie took her to the study to await the President. He came in on crutches, the result of a knee injury in Florida two weeks earlier.(452)
According to Ms. Lewinsky, their sexual encounter began with a sudden kiss: "[T]his was another one of those occasions when I was babbling on about something, and he just kissed me, kind of to shut me up, I think."(453) The President unbuttoned her blouse and touched her breasts without removing her bra.(454) "[H]e went to go put his hand down my pants, and then I unzipped them because it was easier. And I didn't have any panties on. And so he manually stimulated me."(455) According to Ms. Lewinsky, "I wanted him to touch my genitals with his genitals," and he did so, lightly and without penetration.(456) Then Ms. Lewinsky performed oral sex on him, again until he ejaculated.(457)
May 1997: Termination of Sexual Relationship
In May 1997, amid indications that Ms. Lewinsky had been indiscreet, President Clinton terminated the sexual relationship.
A. Questions about Ms. Lewinsky's Discretion
In April or May 1997, according to Ms. Lewinsky, the President asked if she had told her mother about their intimate relationship. She responded: "No. Of course not."(468) (In truth, she had told her mother.(469))
May 24: Break-up
On Saturday, May 24, 1997, according to Ms. Lewinsky, the President ended their intimate relationship. Ms. Lewinsky was at the White House that day from 12:21 to 1:54 p.m.(472) The President was in the Oval Office during most of this period, from 11:59 a.m. to 1:47 p.m.(473) He did not have any telephone calls.(474)
According to Ms. Lewinsky, she got a call from Ms. Currie at about 11 a.m. that day, inviting her to come to the White House at about 1 p.m. Ms. Lewinsky arrived wearing a straw hat with the hat pin the President had given her, and bringing gifts for him, including a puzzle and a Banana Republic shirt. She gave him the gifts in the dining room, and they moved to the area of the study.(475)
According to Ms. Lewinsky, the President explained that they had to end their intimate relationship.(476) Earlier in his marriage, he told her, he had had hundreds of affairs; but since turning 40, he had made a concerted effort to be faithful.(477) He said he was attracted to Ms. Lewinsky, considered her a great person, and hoped they would remain friends. He pointed out that he could do a great deal for her. The situation, he stressed, was not Ms. Lewinsky's fault.(478) Ms. Lewinsky, weeping, tried to persuade the President not to end the sexual relationship, but he was unyielding, then and subsequently.(479) Although she and the President kissed and hugged thereafter, according to Ms. Lewinsky, the sexual relationship was over.(480)
June-October 1997: Continuing Meetings and Calls
Ms. Lewinsky tried to return to the White House staff and to revive her sexual relationship with the President, but she failed at both.
C. July 4 Meeting
On Friday, July 4, 1997, Ms. Lewinsky had what she characterized as a "very emotional" visit with the President.In Ms. Lewinsky's recollection, their meeting began contentiously, with the President scolding her: "[I]t's illegal to threaten the President of the United States."(511) He then told her that he had not read her July 3 letter beyond the "Dear Sir" line; he surmised that it was threatening because Ms. Currie looked upset when she brought it to him. (Ms. Lewinsky suspected that he actually had read the whole thing.)(512) Ms. Lewinsky complained about his failure to get her a White House job after her long wait. Although the President claimed he wanted to be her friend, she said, he was not acting like it. Ms. Lewinsky began weeping, and the President hugged her. While they hugged, she spotted a gardener outside the study window, and they moved into the hallway by the bathroom.(513)
[H]e remarked . . . that he wished he had more time for me. And so I said, well, maybe you will have more time in three years. And I was . . . thinking just when he wasn't President, he was going to have more time on his hands. And he said, well, I don't know, I might be alone in three years. And then I said something about . . . us sort of being together. I think I kind of said, oh, I think we'd be a good team, or something like that. And he . . . jokingly said, well, what are we going to do when I'm 75 and I have to pee 25 times a day?
Ms. Lewinsky testified that "I left that day sort of emotionally stunned," for "I just knew he was in love with me."(516)
August 16 Meeting
On Saturday, August 16, 1997, Ms. Lewinsky tried, unsuccessfully, to resume her sexual relationship with the President.The next day he left for a vacation on Martha's Vineyard.(556)
Ms. Lewinsky testified that she brought birthday gifts for the President (his birthday is August 19):
I had set up in his back office, I had brought an apple square and put a candle and had put his birthday presents out. And after he came back in and I sang happy birthday and he got his presents, I asked him . . . if we could share a birthday kiss in honor of our birthdays, because mine had been just a few weeks before. So, he said that that was okay and we could kind of bend the rules that day. And so . . . we kissed.(557)
Ms. Lewinsky touched the President's genitals through his pants and moved to perform oral sex, but the President rebuffed her.(558) In her recollection: "[H]e said, I'm trying not to do this