Elections highlights of the day: 03/05/2010
Augury of the day
Astrologer Russell Grant has gone out on a limb; the planets are aligning above a Lib-Con coalition. "Astrologically the future lies with Dave and Nick really thanks to their Jupiter in Leo – they may not be as poles apart as they think. But for Gordon, he belongs to the past and Labour should now start thinking about who's next!" For the Prime Minister, even on the large, lifeless ball of gas that is the largest planet, there is no respite.
Passage of the day
But if Brown goes down, it will be fighting. Speaking in a south London church yesterday morning, he went biblical on his rivals. Loosely quoting Amos 5:23-24, the PM declared: "Have done with people who are just presenting images. Have done with people who are just talking, or singing songs that don't mean anything. Have done with the irrelevancies.... Let justice roll like water and righteousness like a mighty stream." Who can avoid comparisons with Ezekiel 25:17 and Samuel L Jackson.
Chicken product of the day
Motorway-related travails for John Prescott. Having been caught behind a lorry with "Blair" emblazoned on its rear, the Prescott Express soon after found itself held up by a Land Rover with a number plate holding an unwelcome historical reminder: EGG 6X. A cruel yolk. [Exit stage left...]
Armada of the day
In the years BC (Before Clegg) Eduardo Suarez was undergoing a miserable campaign. The London correspondent for Spain's El Mundo newspaper, he thought himself doomed to a long, lonely month covering the "dour and boring" PM. But Clegg, or more specifically his wife, Miriam (born Valladolid), has been "like a gift from God", he says. Since her husband's insurgency began, Mrs Clegg has helped Eduardo sell a sackload of stories. Suarez declares, excitably: "People fantasise that 500 years after the Armada we are finally going to put a Spanish woman in No 10."
Prayer of the day
From Philippa Stroud, likely new Tory MP for Sutton and Cheam, accused yesterday of praying for gay people to "drive out their demons through prayer" ( The Observer). Ms Stroud replied: "I make no apology for being a committed Christian. However, it is categorically untrue that I believe homosexuality to be an illness. The idea that I am prejudiced against gay people is false and insulting." In other prayer news, factotums at Tory HQ have their hands tog-ether to ask the Almighty to delay any more articles on Conservatives and gays until after polling day.
Random fact of the day
All the election-winning PMs with degrees since 1935 went to Oxford. Churchill and Major didn't attend uni. (Hat-tip: politicalbetting.com)
Belle Knox: How the porn star student from Duke University became bigger than Justin Bieber
Oscar Pistorius trial: Neighbour feared athlete would use gun that killed his girlfriend Reeva Steenkamp to shoot himself
Top 10 most expensive cities in the world: Singapore named costliest place to live – but what about London?
Oscar Pistorius trial: Athlete 'cheated on me' with Reeva Steenkamp, former girlfriend Samantha Taylor tells Pretoria court
Channel 4 announces two-hour TV show to be broadcast 'Live from Space' later this month
Apple's Tim Cook: Business isn’t just about making profit
Thousands of young people forced to go without food after benefits wrongly stopped under 'draconian' new sanctions regime
Ukraine crisis: New navy chief 'defects' and surrenders Crimean HQ as Putin claims ultranationalists forced intervention
Britain's top vet sparks controversy with call for ban on slashing animals' throats in 'ritual' slaughters for halal and kosher meat products
Ukraine crisis: Russia dismisses '3am ultimatum' as 'total nonsense'
If you're horrified by a flame-roasted dog, you should be shocked at a hog roast
- 3 Italian pensioner hires an escort who turns out to be his son's girlfriend
- 4 Orgasm machine to deliver climax at the push of a button
- 5 Channel 4 announces two-hour TV show to be broadcast 'Live from Space' later this month
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