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Sir Alan? Oh no, it'd be like wearing a suit every day

Playwright who rejected a knighthood says he's probably the last real monarchist left in Britain

By Jonathan Owen

The playwright and author Alan Bennett has revealed for the first time the reason for his steadfast refusal to accept an honour from the Queen. He famously turned down the offer of a CBE in 1988 and then rejected a knighthood in 1996. But far from being the result of any republican sentiment, it emerged this weekend that he doesn't think he could carry off being a knight.

Speaking at the Hay Festival, he said: "I felt that, in my case, it just wouldn't suit me, that's all. It would be like wearing a suit every day of your life."

And while he had no interest in a place on the Queen's honours list, he had no desire to dispose of the monarchy either. "I often think of myself as the last person who is a monarchist, really, simply because I can't imagine if we had anything in its place it would be anything but worse," he said.

He admitted to taking a keen interest in who gets honoured each year. "I always like to look at the lists when they come out, and I like to see the people who've succumbed."

His comments were made to a live audience paying £22 a head to hear him speak at the festival, when it also emerged that he had not wanted people even to know that he had been offered a knighthood. "To actually refuse something and then boast about having refused it would be awful behaviour," the 75-year-old said. "But what happened was that I turned it down, as quite a few people have, but the names of the people who had refused were leaked or were ferreted out by, I think, The Sunday Times and were printed – so I felt able to talk about it and to try and dispel some of the mystique about it."

He then paid tribute to the Prince of Wales as someone who "really works his arse off", and added: "He's much more conscientious and attentive to people than he is ever given credit for and so, as I say, I have a great deal of time for him."

Bennett also confessed that he actually enjoyed writing about the Queen, the subject of his affectionately mocking novel The Uncommon Reader, where he imagines what would happen if the Queen became a lover of books. "She is a very good person to write about, in the sense that you know exactly how she speaks. She has been Queen since 1952 – since I was about 14 – and so, you know, you just become accustomed to her. And so her language, as reported anyway, comes very easily to me, so in that sense I enjoy writing about her," he said.

The butcher's son from Leeds was originally destined to become a scholar. He went to Exeter College, Oxford University, where he got a first-class honours degree in history. But the runaway success of a satirical revue called Beyond the Fringe, which he co-wrote and performed in alongside Dudley Moore, Peter Cook and Jonathan Miller at the Edinburgh Festival in 1960, saw him follow a different path and become one of Britain's most popular playwrights.

Some of his best-known works have been his series of Talking Heads monologues for the BBC in the 1980s, and his plays The Madness of King George III and The History Boys, both of which have been made into films.

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Comments

A Working Man
[info]over325one wrote:
Sunday, 31 May 2009 at 05:30 am (UTC)
Thank heavens for a man of principles. All these silly actors such as M. Caine who sell out their birthright for a knighthood should take not and give the thing back. The only man who should get a reward is Watt Tyler. Fat chance!
Sir. May I have these done before election?
[info]famulla wrote:
Sunday, 31 May 2009 at 07:05 am (UTC)
First, take the suit to laundry, as I can smell this from there to the Arctic Circle that is circle.
Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.
Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable).
Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.
Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of even one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!
Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!! ...... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?
Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
I thank you
Firozali A.Mulla
First, take the suit to laundry, as I can smell this from there to the Arctic Circle that is circle.
[info]famulla wrote:
Sunday, 31 May 2009 at 07:07 am (UTC)
First, take the suit to laundry, as I can smell this from there to the Arctic Circle that is circle. 2
Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy? HELLO! Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!
Q: Is swimming well for your figure?
A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.
Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!
Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets AND.....
For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies.
1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
5. The Germans drink many beers and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
CONCLUSION:
Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently, what kills you
AND REMEMBER:
'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO, What a Ride!'
I thank you
Firozali A.Mulla

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