Flat Earth: Kangaroo court

THEY don't speak with the same accent. Say after me: Crosby Stills and Nash. If you are an Australian, it will be Crosby Steels and Nash. A New Zealander will get the 'Stills' bit right, but it will come across as a gutteral mumble.

We know this because an unfortunate New Zealand bricklayer, Ron Meijer (no relation to our prime minister, though they both have trouble with their vowels), who had spent the past four years in Australia and picked up a Strine accent, lost top prize in a television quiz on Tuesday. A new car was taken from him after New Zealand television executives listened to his answer 10 times, and ruled that he had said 'steels' not 'stills'.

But New Zealand viewers kicked up such a stink that by Friday the bricklayer got his prize back. 'There is a God in heaven, and maybe an Australian one at that,' Meijer said. Our man in Auckland says his remark was perhaps unwise, and that the prospect of Him-Up-There being an Aussie may well lead viewers to demand that he forfeit the car for good.