If you ask me: John Prescott got close to the flame but seemed to learn little about the fire

News in pictures
News in pictures
Opinion blogs

Paul Volcker stands tall against the banking lobby

Why is Europe, which likes to present itself as an opponent of speculative "Anglo-Saxon" finance, li...

“Not growing inequality”

What do we want? “A fairer sharing of rewards not growing inequality.” Well said, Ed Mil...

A defence of competition in health care

Just when you thought he was six feet under and all forgotten, Andrew Lansley comes bouncing back up...

If you ask me, the prospect of John Prescott fulfilling his post-office potential becomes more enticing by the week. And before you splutter on your Cheerios and ask yourself if you've missed something – though it would be amusing to imagine the "great butcher of English prose" running a sub-Post Office, complete with his cheap uniform and a big, "Free with Look and Learn" badge – I'm actually referring to whatever it is he is going to do next.

Obviously he will be doing a reality TV show, but having done one myself (that I don't think anyone saw) and knowing several other people who are presently doing them (apparently with some success) nowadays I just assume that everyone does one. And if Prescott were to participate in one, there's no reason why it shouldn't be any good; it's simply that, from a journalistic point of view, it wouldn't be very interesting.

As there was such a deluge of publicity surrounding the autobiographies by Prescott, Lord Levy and Cherie Blair, I was going to leave well alone, but as I was working my way through Matthew Parris's far more agreeable memoir, Chance Witness: An Outsider's Life in Politics, I was reminded of what a funny – and yes, slightly ludicrous – character Prescott can be. And so many thought so. Whereas Parris was always cruel, without wishing to be so, Christopher Meyer – in his own book of New Labour revelations – was seemingly intentionally so, building a picture of a politician who simply didn't know what he was talking about, and that if he did, he was incapable of articulating it.

If you haven't read Prezza: My Story – and there's no good reason why you should have – you'll know as much about the man as you would have done if you'd read it. Frankly, I find it remarkable that while the New Labour period is one of the most dissected periods of British political history, Prescott's book tells you precisely nothing. How can you be so close to the flame and learn so little about the fire?

It was said that Prescott had a long and inconclusive war with the English language. Having read his book he appears to have had a long and inconclusive war with his career, too. Who knows where life will take him next?

Actually I don't think the Post Office is such a bad idea after all.

Dylan Jones is the editor of 'GQ'

Independent Comment
blog comments powered by Disqus
Career Services

Day In a Page

No secularism please, we're British

No secularism please, we're British

Arguments about the role of religion in national life have recently acquired a new urgency
Harold Tillman: 'Chinese tourists can save the high street – if we let them'

Harold Tillman interview

'Chinese tourists can save the high street – if we let them'
Working as a jail torturer ruined my life

Working as a jail torturer ruined my life

Meet the former soldier who has joined the political prisoners he tortured in Turkey's Mamak prison by suing the generals who led a regime of terror
The local high street jet shop

The local high street jet shop

Got a spare $50m and can't stand the queues at Heathrow? Get yourself down to London's first private plane dealership
Do you like your doctor? It could be the death of you

Do you like your doctor?

It could be the death of you...
The mysterious affair of how Agatha Christie is teaching foreigners English

How Agatha Christie is teaching foreigners English

Twenty of the author's novels have been adapted and presented with learning notes and a CD
Six Grammys, five years off: Adele puts love before career

Six Grammys, five years off

Adele puts love before career
The 10 Best binoculars

The 10 Best binoculars

From no-frills to bins with digital cameras
Milan for £300

Milan for £300?

A cultural family holiday - on a budget - to Italy's most stylish city
'Black-hole' resorts: Turn up, tune out, log off

'Black-hole' resorts

Turn up, tune out, log off
New Arsenal face an old question of credibility in San Siro

New Arsenal face an old question of credibility in San Siro

Remodelled since winning in Milan in 2008, for all their consistency – and prize-money – Wenger's side are yet to claim a European title
James Lawton: This prodigal son deserves no forgiveness

James Lawton: This prodigal son deserves no forgiveness

City would be putting their desire to win title ahead of morals if Tevez plays for them
Mark Cavendish: Is Olympic gold at end of the rainbow?

Mark Cavendish interview

Is Olympic gold at end of the rainbow?
Apple admits it has a human rights problem

Apple admits it has a human rights problem

After years of complaints and workers' suicides in China the technology giant faces up to the human cost of its gadgets
Peter Moore: 'I feel guilty I'm the only one alive'

Peter Moore interview

'I feel guilty I'm the only one alive'