Simon Carr
The Independent's parliamentary sketch writer and columnist since 2000, Simon Carr was described by Tony Blair as "the most vicious sketch writer working in Britain today". "Poison," said Charles Clarke.
In the 1980s he helped launch The Independent, and was a speech writer for the prime minister of New Zealand from 1992 to 1994. His working principle is "Indignation keeps us young."
The Sketch: Ed Balls: the dull thud of a party next door
Can't they put Ed Balls into law? Make him the subject of a Guarantee? Can't he be a right that every parent has? If for the first time Balls was put on a statutory basis millions of people would be certain of access to him.
Recently by Simon Carr
The Sketch: More a living will than a Queen's Speech
Thursday, 19 November 2009
"Check against delivery". That was the instruction on the front of the Queen's Speech. It's the one thing we don't have to worry about with our head of state. She won't get seized with inspiration and announce a "November Guarantee to create 30,000 jobs".
The Sketch: A public need to find a truth too secret to reveal
Friday, 13 November 2009
Secret inquests went to the Lords and yesterday came back. Poor Jack Straw regards himself as a champion of coroners' juries but has to introduce this new way because there are things too secret for ordinary people to hear.
The Sketch: Questions are not there to be dignified
Thursday, 12 November 2009
What is going through the Prime Minister's mind when he says of Cameron: "This is the man who made a cast-iron guarantee on a referendum on the Lisbon treaty!" He laughs lingeringly, and seems to enjoy the sally. His back benches roar away.
The Sketch: He's forgotten the first rule of leadership: indifference
Wednesday, 11 November 2009
They have strong stomachs in the lobby. I'm not sure I can go through another one of those press conferences.
Simon Carr: Trust him, he's the Justice Secretary ... Oh, if only we could
Tuesday, 10 November 2009
Sketch: We know that ministerial assurances at the despatch box aren't worth the air they're breathed into
Don't call me an alcoholic
Monday, 9 November 2009
Simon Carr: Binge-drinking, I can remember, was once praised as being safer than steady soaking
The Sketch: When goodbye seems to be the longest word
Friday, 6 November 2009
What a long goodbye it is. There are six months to go but the committee has started its farewells. They've had over a decade together and now they await the deluge. Some will be standing down, others put down. Some will be promoted, others discarded. Meanwhile, we are entering the pre-election period of nothing happening.
The Sketch: The joys of financial ignorance
Wednesday, 4 November 2009
These billions and those trillions, who's keeping track any more? How? Does the money matter, now that we're printing it? If overspending got us into this mess, how does overspending get us out? Who knows? Most of us are so ignorant we don't know that we don't know.
Simon Carr: Johnson sparkles as Brown crumbles
Tuesday, 3 November 2009
Sketch: The Prime Minister marches forward like one of those hostile statues in a Tomb Raider film
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Columnist Comments
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Has the level of political debate really come to this?
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This week sees the best festival of the American year
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1 Oliver Miles: The key question – is Blair a war criminal?
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3 John Rentoul: Like it or not, there it is. A Tory policy
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Emailed
1 Johann Hari: The real reason Obama is not making much progress
2 Harry Ritchie: Henry didn't handle the ball, he chanced his arm. They all do
3 Oliver Miles: The key question – is Blair a war criminal?
5 Rupert Cornwell: Only the turkeys don't look forward to Thanksgiving
6 Sarah Sands: Out of the shadows and into obscurity
7 Hamish McRae: China will soon export its ideas as well
8 Amy Jenkins: We can't help ourselves: our love affair with skinny just goes on
9 Dominic Lawson: A retort to the population control freaks
10 Editor-At-Large: The internet is no place to fight a general election
Commented
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8Henry's replay call wrong-foots French
9Leading article: Heavy hand of Rome
10Leading article: Safe and boring ? but the new EU line-up does the job
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