Simon Carr

The Independent's parliamentary sketch writer and columnist since 2000, Simon Carr was described by Tony Blair as "the most vicious sketch writer working in Britain today". "Poison," said Charles Clarke.

In the 1980s he helped launch The Independent, and was a speech writer for the prime minister of New Zealand from 1992 to 1994. His working principle is "Indignation keeps us young."

The Sketch: How sensible debate is strangled by taboos

That nana Sion Simon kept "counselling" people not to "talk down" the economy. It's the new way of countering (or suppressing) criticism. If you stand up and welcome spending on apprentices and call for more spending – he accuses you of "talking the economy down". Labour's David Taylor was rebuked for saying that management of large projects wasn't the most glittering success of the public service. He got it as well. "Talking it down."

Recently by Simon Carr

The Sketch: Grumpy and toothless: the Conservative front bench

Thursday, 20 November 2008

What a row of grim faces on the Tory front bench. Despite any and all efforts to look like winners, the whole team has the air of Eric Pickles. Poor George Osborne looked bankrupt. His credit collapsed. The Prime Minister is right (it's the last time I'll use those words): it's all George Osborne's fault.

Simon Carr: Mr Keynes' funny farm... a bullock outfoxes the fox

Tuesday, 18 November 2008

Sketch: Were the Tories able to dance around him laughing and shove a cat down the back of his pants? In a word: no

The Sketch: Is Harriet harmed or did Bryant leave his brain in the lobby?

Friday, 14 November 2008

What's going on between Harriet and her prot�g�, Chris Bryant? One old stager told me that no secretary of state likes it when their assistant or under-minister makes a hit. Oh, they laugh along in public, but inside they die a little every time it happens.

The Sketch: Tragedy casts a shadow over the political ring

Thursday, 13 November 2008

Everything's changed for David Cameron. The Prime Minister said something true and useful in PMQs. Gordon Brown has emerged from the abyss into which we cast him. Boring he may be, flat-footed as ever, pettily partisan – but he is still there without having changed a jot. And so, as he confronts his enemies, abusers, and critics it is possible to discern the lineaments of shame as they – we – review the way he was treated in his wilderness year.

The Sketch: As Miliband spoke, I wanted to chuck things

Wednesday, 12 November 2008

It's not really cricket to say that the whole thing's a waste of time; we're supposed to look at it quietly and work out whether it works on its own terms. But Foreign Office questions is a complete waste of time and it's not just because of the Foreign Secretary.

Simon Carr: This sort of appalling language has no place in the Commons

Tuesday, 11 November 2008

The Sketch: The recent fracas of Ross and Brand produced a very poor show in the Commons

The Sketch: Mandelson leaves us frozen in frustration

Friday, 7 November 2008

Are they chairladies, in the Lords? It sounds a little menial for their position. I collared chairlady Cohen outside the European Sub-Committee A and asked, "Did you get anything out of that?"

The Sketch: Wind of change makes everyone a winner

Thursday, 6 November 2008

"I'd like to congratulate Barack Obama, whose Scottish ancestry provided the qualities needed to lead a great nation." That was Gordon's version. Cameron's was: "Obama's time in the Bullingdon gave him the best insight into what America so desperately needs."

The Sketch: Are our patient records safe in their hands? Just ask the database...

Wednesday, 5 November 2008

Databases epitomise everything that's wrong with modern administration. In Health questions Andrew MacKay asked that nice Ben Bradshaw about the security of the national collection of information that is called Connecting for Health or Choose 'n' Book or the Spine.