Outside the Box: Fall guy Rooney went up in smoke for 'playing games'

So what precisely was it that made Wayne Rooney the, er, fall guy for the celebrated Edenbridge Bonfire Society, his 50-foot effigy having gone up in smoke in the Kent village yesterday evening? We can reveal that Tony Blair was at one stage 2-1 favourite this year but committee member Jon Mitchell tells us: "We did think that Wayne Rooney had probably peaked too early. The stories about the appalling way he treated Coleen were subsiding. Then he managed to annoy everyone all over again by playing games in the media in order to renegotiate his contract. We have a Man U supporter on our committee and even he wanted it to be Wayne."

No rickets from Galaxy No 1

It is a big day for LA Galaxy, who stage the home leg of their play-off semi-final against Seattle Sounders at the evocatively named Home Depot Center. The Galaxy lead 1-0 from the first game, thanks in part to the efforts of you-know-who, the former superstar of English football. Yes, that's goalkeeper Donovan Ricketts, the 33-year-old Jamaican who played over 100 League games for Bradford City. Famously laidback, and renowned for his mild manner and dislike of swearing, he was sent off at Southend five years ago. The crowd had been subjecting him to some famous Essex wit (which City alleged was racial) and when his team went 1-0 up, he turned and raised his index finger "to show it was 1-0". The referee sent him off, prompting the headline: "Sent off for celebrating a goal." Dean Windass, no stranger to this column (he recently came out of retirement to join Scarborough Athletic), went in goal for the last hour and was beaten only once in a stunning show that led his team-mates to christen him "Deano Zoff".

Matt finish is incredible

Club football in Northern Ireland tends to have a low profile outside Ulster, so there is understandable pride in a Glentoran player making the shortlist for Fifa's Puskas Award for the Goal of the Year. The strike in question was by Matthew Burrows for the east Belfast club in the last minute of their home game with Portadown last month. Check it out on YouTube and ask: "How did he do that?" The criteria for the award include "aesthetics", on which Burrows scores highly; "importance of match", which with respect to Glentoran may not count for quite as much; "absence of luck" and "fair play", on which he cannot be faulted. Footage of the 10 contenders will be on Fifa's website later this month when the full list is announced, and the award will be presented in Zurich on 10 January.

Beating nine men is so tough

After West Bromwich Albion had two players sent off in the opening half-hour against Blackpool, our columnist Ian Holloway understandably said that he had never been in that position before. Reader Graham Fildes, a Luton Town supporter from Jersey, points out that something similar had occurred to Holloway, when he was manager of Queens Park Rangers in 2002. "Luton had Steve Howard sent off in the first quarter of an hour and then Kevin Nicholls dismissed shortly after half-time." Unlike last Monday's game, Ollie's boys were unable to find a way through and could only draw 0-0.

s.tongue@independent.co.uk

Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
Caption competition
Caption competition
Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?

Bleacher Report

Daily Quiz
Independent Dating
and  

By clicking 'Search' you
are agreeing to our
Terms of Use.

Day In a Page

Is this the future of flying: battery-powered planes made of plastic, and without flight decks?

Is this the future of flying?

Battery-powered planes made of plastic, and without flight decks
Isis are barbarians – but the Caliphate is a dream at the heart of all Muslim traditions

Isis are barbarians

but the Caliphate is an ancient Muslim ideal
The Brink's-Mat curse strikes again: three tons of stolen gold that brought only grief

Curse of Brink's Mat strikes again

Death of John 'Goldfinger' Palmer the latest killing related to 1983 heist
Greece debt crisis: 'The ministers talk to us about miracles' – why Greeks are cynical ahead of the bailout referendum

'The ministers talk to us about miracles'

Why Greeks are cynical ahead of the bailout referendum
Call of the wild: How science is learning to decode the way animals communicate

Call of the wild

How science is learning to decode the way animals communicate
Greece debt crisis: What happened to democracy when it’s a case of 'Vote Yes or else'?

'The economic collapse has happened. What is at risk now is democracy...'

If it doesn’t work in Europe, how is it supposed to work in India or the Middle East, asks Robert Fisk
The science of swearing: What lies behind the use of four-letter words?

The science of swearing

What lies behind the use of four-letter words?
The Real Stories of Migrant Britain: Clive fled from Zimbabwe - now it won't have him back

The Real Stories of Migrant Britain

Clive fled from Zimbabwe - now it won’t have him back
Africa on the menu: Three foodie friends want to popularise dishes from the continent

Africa on the menu

Three foodie friends want to popularise dishes from the hot new continent
Donna Karan is stepping down after 30 years - so who will fill the DKNY creator's boots?

Who will fill Donna Karan's boots?

The designer is stepping down as Chief Designer of DKNY after 30 years. Alexander Fury looks back at the career of 'America's Chanel'
10 best statement lightbulbs

10 best statement lightbulbs

Dare to bare with some out-of-the-ordinary illumination
Wimbledon 2015: Heather Watson - 'I had Serena's poster on my wall – now I'm playing her'

Heather Watson: 'I had Serena's poster on my wall – now I'm playing her'

Briton pumped up for dream meeting with world No 1
Wimbledon 2015: Nick Bollettieri - It's time for big John Isner to produce the goods to go with his thumping serve

Nick Bollettieri's Wimbledon Files

It's time for big John Isner to produce the goods to go with his thumping serve
Dustin Brown: Who is the tennis player who knocked Rafael Nadal out of Wimbeldon 2015?

Dustin Brown

Who is the German player that knocked Nadal out of Wimbeldon 2015?
Ashes 2015: Damien Martyn - 'England are fired up again, just like in 2005...'

Damien Martyn: 'England are fired up again, just like in 2005...'

Australian veteran of that Ashes series, believes the hosts' may become unstoppable if they win the first Test