Outside the Box: Kember's no Thierry... but he still got stick from chairman!

When the definitive story of cheating – or otherwise – in football comes to be written, 'The Independent on Sunday' archive will be a useful source of reference. Some 15 years ago, the paper ran a feature called "Q and A" in which readers came up with answers to questions of sporting trivia. In February 1994, one of them mused optimistically: "Are there any examples of a professional footballer who has put the ball in the net asking the referee not to award the goal because he had handled?" Alas, a majority of tales concerned goals that should never have been allowed, such as Lou Macari punching the ball in during a Scotland Under-23 game against Wales, and Reading's Tommy Youlden hitting the side-netting against Rochdale but being awarded a goal in a 2-0 win. Youlden read the item and wrote in the following week, adding: "The linesman was in little position to advise the referee on his decision because he had already suffered a suspected broken ankle and spent most of the first half limping along the touchline. I had a conversation with the referee after the game and he still insisted he had made the correct decision." Another reader mentioned the happier case of Crystal Palace's Steve Kember admitting that a goal against Nottingham Forest in 1971 was not legitimate. This week Kember was able to confirm the details to OTB, though he says his confession was not immediate: "The ball hit a defender and went outside the post, so I threw it for a corner, only for the referee to give a goal. We all went back to the centre circle with Forest players protesting, but the referee finally asked me if it was a goal and I said it wasn't. Our own chairman even gave me stick in the Sunday papers for owning up, before agreeing later that the referee shouldn't have put me in that position."

It rains and pours for Derby

A survey suggesting that football fans travel an average of 1,900 miles per season does not mention the ghastly delays often encountered. Derby County fans were taking up to six hours to reach the game at Swansea last Friday week, all because of what traffic reports described as a Reggie Perrin-like "collapsed manhole at Monmouth". It did not help that their team suffered too. The fire alarm at Derby's south Wales hotel went off during the night, forcing the players and staff out to huddle in the team coach, but when the players made a dash back inside through the heavy rain, reserve goalkeeper Saul Deeney slipped and twisted his ankle (he is out for six weeks). Ross Atkins, the third choice, was summoned and travelled down the next day, running into the same traffic as the fans and arriving just 30 minutes before kick-off. Oh, and Derby lost 1-0. To a full-back's goal in the 81st minute.

Charity begins at home

Cynics and football-haters may not be impressed, but with today's home game against Chelsea being their designated charity matchday, Arsenal's players and directors will all be giving one day's wages to Great Ormond Street Children's Hospital this week. Frank Lampard has apparently told a patient there that he will do the same if Chelsea lose; which may just sway neutrals into welcoming a home win. Supporters can donate £2 by texting Gosh to 63320. This season's target is to raise £500,000, which would take the Gunners' total in six years of supporting a specific charity each season to an impressive £2.5m.

s.tongue@independent.co.uk