In a professional career spanning almost two decades, Simon "Smudger" Smith has played for over 67 clubs. The ultimate utility player, as his pace has diminished he has reinvented himself time and again, from poacher to holding midfielder, centre-back to goalkeeper.
We may not have seen the huge upset some predicted in the American presidential election this week but we saw one nobody predicted at Celtic Park. The Hoops triumphed over the mighty Barcelona and it was enough to reduce the onlooking Rod Stewart to tears. I suppose that's why they call it an upset. One can only assume he had big money on Barça. Or somebody answered in the negative when he inquired as to whether they found him sexually appealing.
It was far from plain "Sailing" (Rod Stewart version) for Man City. Despite fighting back from 2-0 down, they couldn't quite nab the win. It's quite clear that a major mistake was made in the dying moments and that poor decision could cost them dear. Only Roberto Mancini knows why he didn't send Joe Hart up.
It was a better week for City's neighbours as Man United won in Portugal amid a stadium full of fans shouting "Braga, Braga, Braga". There was a power cut in the second half that lasted 12 minutes. Nobody knows what happened but I can only guess Fergie left his hairdryer plugged in at half-time and the meter ran out. I'm glad someone had the right change; I'm assuming it was Bébé.
Chelsea snatched a victory in the dying moments but I fear the TV analysts have spent too much time this week engrossed by their political counterparts as they repeatedly referred to that group as "too close to call". Arsenal, meanwhile, threw away a two-goal lead and Arsène Wenger felt compelled to say his players currently don't realise how good they are. Oddly enough, when I played under Arsey, he was at pains to say pretty much the exact opposite.
Cristiano Ronaldo has received a load of stick this week for suggesting he'd vote for himself to win the Ballon d'Or if it were allowed. Like normal, it's one rule for footballers and another for everyone else. President Obama voted for himself once again and nobody batted an eyelid.
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