Outside Edge

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Distressing news from Beckingham Palace; all the ground-floor windows have had to be boarded up after being smashed, and David and Victoria Beckham say they have become "prisoners in our own home" after being targeted by vandals. All of which is very sad for a fiftysomething west Belfast couple formerly known as Gerard and Elizabeth Donnelly, who in 2003 changed their names, and that of their house, in honour of their heroes Posh 'n' Becks. "There is a big anti-social behaviour problem round here; a group of lads are running around terrorising people," said David. Police are investigating whether any Premier League footballers have been attending parties in the area.


Asking price for a Waterford Crystal American football inscribed with New England Patriots insignia and: "19-0 – Super Bowl XLII Champions." A pity, then, that they lost the Super Bowl last Sunday to finish the season 18-1. Look for a hefty discount.

Strange bedfellows of the week

Bitter rivals British Airways and Virgin Atlantic surprisingly announced on Friday that they have joined forces to become official sponsors of the London 2012 Olympics. Decisions, decisions... which should flyers favour? BA have aggravated hordes of surfers and canoeists by refusing to carry their equipment; but then Virgin are run by Richard Branson. There is possibly a joke about Virgin and not going all the way in here somewhere, but if there is we can't quite put our finger on it.

Good week for

Eli Manning, the quarterback who led the underdog New York Giants to Super Bowl victory last Sunday... Kristan Bromley, Briton from Sheffield won second skeleton bob World Cup crown... Fabio Capello, victory in his first match as England football manager... and Micah Richards, defender agreed a bumper new deal with Manchester City.

Bad week for

Andre Bikey, Cameroon and Reading defender, misses today's African Nations Cup final after being sent off in semi-final for shoving a medical official... AFC Bournemouth, League One club forced into administration... Sébastien Loeb, world champion, out of Swedish Rally after rolling his Citroën on the fourth stage... and Spanish motor racing, threatened with the loss of grands prix after racist abuse of Lewis Hamilton during testing at Barcelona.

Ball skills of the week

When you're 2-0 down, it's time to change tactics. Borussia Dortmund's midfielder Sebastian Kehl certainly fooled the MSV Duisburg defence last weekend when he came flying in for a cross, then turned round and propelled it into the net from 20 yards with his buttocks. The game ended 3-3, but Duisburg rather than Dortmund remain the Bundesliga's bottom team. Don't try this in Peru, though; when a Sport Ancash player controlled the ball with a nifty bit of rump action recently, his Universitario opponents took it as an insult, provoking a mass brawl and the match's abandonment.