If it means we never again have to hear the boringly monotonous question (will Andy Murray ever win a Grand Slam?), pray for a Scottish victory in Melbourne this morning. In the north-east of Australia, England's cricketers play a poignant one-dayer in Brisbane in the aftermath of the floods. Arsenal and Huddersfield, two clubs who will forever be linked with Herbert Chapman – who won League titles and FA Cups with both – meet in the Cup at the Emirates. West Ham host Notting-ham Forest (where dignity and class will be in opposite dug-outs as Avram Grant takes on Billy Davies), while Notts County hope to shock Man City.
I upset many rugby league fans last week when one of my lame attempts at humour backfired spectacularly. Even my claims to love the sport, having been a Blackpool Borough fan many moons ago, fell on deaf ears. Anyway, no more bad gags. Harlequins stage their pre-season media day at 11am.
Tasty Premier League action as Arsenal host Everton, Man United entertain Villa and Chelsea go to Sunderland.
Can't look past the footy as Man City go to Birmingham, Spurs visit Blackburn and there is a potential belter between Blackpool and West Ham.
The Australian Women's Open golftees off in Melbourne. Will RichardKeys and Andy Gray be tuning in to watch the birdies?
Big kick-off for the Six Nations, with the first-ever Friday-night start. Good luck all you England fans hoping to get home from Cardiff late on a Friday.
More egg-chasing as France host Scotland and Ireland go to Italy, while there are three feisty footy fixtures as Wolves host Man U, Arsenal go to Newcastle and the Baggies boing to Moneybags City. And at last the three Pakistan cricketers learn their fate.Reuse content