The Hacker: Arrested development after police inspector lays down law
Sunday 06 March 2011
Related articles
Among the tell-tale signs of approaching spring last week were daffodils, crocuses, primroses and an old fool proving once more how treacherous it is to emerge from a long winter feeling as if the green shoots of improvement are creeping up your trouser leg.
The only thing that crept up my trouser leg on Wednesday was a wicked east wind that blew away all thoughts of springtime.
It also blew away the silly illusion that has been gradually building up over the past few months that my swing was getting more reliable.
You would have thought that my cruel betrayal by countless false dawns would have cautioned me but there I was in this column two weeks ago confessing to a slight stirring of optimism.
It wasn't totally baseless. I've been playing as regularly as possible during these interminable winter months and when your ball has either been bouncing madly off ice-bound fairways or getting bogged down in the mud, it is difficult to measure your game.
But my playing partners have remarked that I am hitting the ball more cleanly and straighter. It is an observation made not so much through studying my swing as counting the times that they have to trudge through the rough looking for my ball.
The clincher came a couple of weeks ago when I played with the Wednesday swindle, the Chips, and registered a 98, which is level par off my handicap of 28.
Granted we were playing off forward tees but the course was playing very long and it was, at the very least, an encouragement that my ambition of breaking 100 in a medal was in sight.
I played with the Chips again last Wednesday and it is now more like a mirage. I had a shocker and managed to scrape together a demoralising 18 points.
I didn't do my partner much good, either. The Chips is an individual Stableford competition but there is a draw for playing pairings. There were 17 of us and we each put a ball in a hat.
I was drawn with three others. We then threw the balls up and the ones that landed nearest together were the pairs. I was drawn with Paul against two Brians, one of whom is club president and both of whom are very steady golfers.
The Chips have their own handicapping system and for some reason they make me play off 24. But with Paul off six, I felt quietly confident. Despite the fact he has been a member for 15 years we hadn't met before and I don't think he knew what he was in for. I hit the ball all over the place and I would have been apologetic even if he wasn't a police inspector.
But he couldn't have been more supportive. He hits the ball a mile and some of his approach shots were excellent but an astonishing number of his putts shaved the hole and kept his score down.
Only once did he exhort me to pull my finger out, only not as crudely. We were three down with five to play and we came to a par five where, miraculously, I was on the edge of the green for three with a shot. Paul, who'd been in the trees, said: "I'm relying on you."
He then put a wedge within two feet. "What's the matter, don't you trust me?" I asked. He laughed and I promptly three-putted but I was first down and won the hole – the only time I came in all day.
We got them back to one down but our opponents played very well to keep their noses in front and we lost on the 17th. At a pound a head it wasn't a massive loss but the performance was a bitter disappointment.
Was this just a temporary setback, a warning not to get too far ahead of myself, or another indication of the severity of my task? As we say in Wales, it's back to the draining board.
Simon Iliffe's tip of the week
No 89: Feel for chipping
Many times I have tried to help someone who has just started to play, attempting to make them understand how to "feel" a chip shot. As it isn't a full swing, it's very difficult to tell someone how hard or soft to hit the ball.
Just imagine you are standing at the side of a green and you are going to throw the ball underarm on to the green towards the flag.
Picture how far your arm swings back and forward and how much effort you use.
Also you will notice, the higher you throw the ball the less it will roll. Now try to emulate this length of swing and effort with your golf club in hand. Remember, too, that you must pick a club with the right loft relative to how high you throw the ball. You'll see quite quickly there is a very similar feel to throwing the ball and chipping it.
Try this next time you are practising your chipping, and I guarantee that your distance control will improve.
Simon Iliffe is head professional at Bramley Golf Club, Surrey. www.theshortgame.co.uk
Latest in Sport
Sport blogs
iBet: Mercedes and Hamilton to roar in Monaco
Monaco is a street circuit where driver ability is more important than anywhere else and if we take ...
by Gareth Purnell
24 May 2013 02:00 AM
On The Road at the Giro d’Italia: It sounds sadistic, but the team live for the mountain stages
Three weeks ago as I drove off the Eurostar, I remember thinking what a very long time it was until ...
by Martin Ayres
23 May 2013 05:29 PM
iBet: Rose has the ammunition for Wentworth
McDowell did brilliantly to land the World Match Play title in Bulgaria last week, but it’s a format...
by Gareth Purnell
23 May 2013 09:13 AM
-
David Moyes delighted after Rio Ferdinand agrees to stay at Manchester United with new one-year contract
-
Sergio Garcia / Tiger Woods 'fried chicken' racism row takes fresh twist after 'coloured athletes' comment
-
After racist remark, Sergio Garcia fights for reputation as Tiger Woods slams 'hurtful' fried chicken joke
-
New Manchester City manager must deliver five trophies in five years
-
Manchester United slash interest bill by £10m a year
- 1 Pope Francis: Being an atheist is alright as long as you do good
- 2 Man and woman arrested on suspicion of conspiracy to murder victim of Woolwich machete attack, named as Drummer Lee Rigby
- 3 'Sickening, deluded and unforgivable': Horrific attack brings terror to London’s streets
- 4 Archaeologists uncover nearly 5,000 cave paintings in Burgos, Mexico
- 5 Woolwich attack: The EDL will seek to exploit this evil crime for their own evil ends
Get your summer started with British Military Fitness
BMF is the UK’s biggest and best loved outdoor fitness classes
Visit York
Find out what The Independent's resident travel expert has to say about one of the most beautiful small cities in the world
Making reading fun for kids
Nook is donating eReaders to volunteers at high-need schools and participating in exclusive events throughout the campaign.
Introducing the 'Get Reading' campaign
Get the latest on The Evening Standard's campaign to get London's children reading.
Enter the latest Independent competitions
Win anything from gadgets to five-star holidays on our competitions and offers page.
Business videos from commercial thought leaders
Watch the best in the business world give their insights into the world of business.
Career Services
Day In a Page
The man who's eaten everywhere
A Berliner in 1963 – but did John F Kennedy once admire Adolf Hitler?
Banned Iranian director to attend Cannes Film Festival
The 10 Best salt and pepper sets
Ferran Soriano: Predicting success if Manchester City 'vision' is followed
Edward VIII’s phone calls - and how MI5 bugged them




Comments