Quotes of the Week

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The Independent Online
It makes me a little bit more aerodynamic out there on the courts, you know? Andre Agassi on his newly hairless torso.

He's not fat, he's lovely. Ballgirl on Agassi.

I think I just had a big breakfast. Agassi.

We have to take what we have done here into the real world. Mark Petchey, five-set loser to Jakob Hlasek, on the Brits.

I do the Telegraph crossword most days and my picture was just above the crossword, so I enjoyed that. Andrew Foster.

The whole of our national sport is not doing very well. We may be under the wrong star sign. Venus may be in juxtaposition with the wrong planet. Ted Dexter, England cricket chairman, attempts to explain his side's poor performances.

When they come out next time, they should be treated like Sri Lanka or Zimbabwe and given only three Tests. Geoff Marsh, former Australian Test player, on England.

Somewhere along the line the players and myself made a pig's arse of it and I have to accept that. Graham Taylor on England's season.