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Stan Hey: 6-5 Against

At the moment England exited the World Twenty20 one of my back teeth fell out recreating the pain that Paul Collingwood's team were feeling. Though not superstitious I thought this was punishment for betting unpatriotically, something that all punters will have to consider this weekend.

The first South Africa-Lions Test kicks off today and "smash-mouth" rugby is inevitable. Despite the Lions' tour wins, the bookies offer little support, with the Springboks odds-on, around 4-11, and the Lions as big as 9-4 with Paddy Power. South Africa are evens for a 3-0 series win. Yet the first Test may be the Lions' best chance of a win – they're match-fit and have their best XV. South Africa haven't played for a while. £10 win Lions.

Flying the flag tomorrow will be Jenson Button, with the British GP seemingly at his mercy – he was already 10-11 with Betfred before practice started, and with the Brawn-Mercedes reigning supreme, it should be a home run for Button, provided the FOTA/FIA bitching doesn't interfere.

Wimbledon will surge with optimism for Andy Murray but this can be a burden. But in tennis momentum is all, so Murray could deny Roger Federer his Sampras-beating grand slam – £10 win, 3-1 Paddy Power; a tenner also on Serena Williams (5-2 generally) as it's her turn. Maybe I can afford a trip to the dentist?

*Score from Royal Ascot so far: one winner; one third; one non-runner; plus an 8-1 win by, er, my ante-post bet for the Derby. Happy days.