Philately has never got me anywhere, although my early interest in stamp-collecting means I still take an interest in matters relating to postage stamps. As a boy, I loved everything about stamps: they were like miniature works of art (the good ones, anyway), and I found them a much more interesting and engaging way to learn about geography.

Marks & Spencer debuted its summer advert last night, and after 2011's Miami-set extravaganza it has gone for a British theme, featuring egg and spoon races, rowing boats and more Union Jacks than a BNP convention. Fans of M&S' formulaic advertising won't be disappointed; this one ticks every box.

Nine-times European champions Real Madrid have unveiled plans to build a $1 billion holiday resort in the United Arab Emirates that is due to open in January 2015.

It’s a captive audience for musicians, although stomach-churning nausea may be the most common response. Rock bands will create exclusive soundtracks for roller-coaster rides under a new deal agreed by EMI.

US Outlook It was, in the words of Neil Patrick Harris's medley of Disney tunes, a super-spicy-synergistic-glitzy-celebration. Emphasis on the synergistic.

The grand emancipation of America's popular performing orcas has been postponed, thanks to the not-so-startling conclusion of a district court judge in San Diego that, on balance, whales and humans are not the same thing.

Alternative Investment Market-listed Lo-Q has won another contract with Merlin Entertain- ments, which will see its queuing technology installed in the theme park operator's Legoland Deutschland, above. Lo-Q is the company behind the Q-bot, a device with which harassed parents at many British theme parks may already be familiar: it enables them to reserve times on busy rides rather than having to queue.

The male giant panda at Edinburgh Zoo has been taken ill suffering from colic.

1. The Battle of the River Plate.

The Rainbow Trust's support workers show patients and families how to get back on track

Agyness Deyn is to attempt the transition from walking the catwalk to treading the boards, with a West End debut pencilled in for early next year. The role in The Leisure Society may not be too much of a problem for the supermodel, as it was described yesterday as a "toxic comedy" that offers a "glimpse into a grotesque world of self-indulgent excess". Ms Deyn will play Paula, a "promiscuous free spirit" invited to the dinner party of a self-obsessed professional couple that spirals out of control.

Sir David Attenborough has defended using footage in his Frozen Planet series of a polar bear tending her newborn cubs that was shot in a zoo.

Today: The West End of London welcomes Christmas shoppers. Oxford Street and Regent Street are closed to traffic this weekend, opening up the roads to pedestrians (westendvip.com). Meanwhile in Tulúm on Mexico's Mayan Riviera, Design Hotels is hosting a pop-up beach camp of 99 rustic-chic cabanas. Papaya Playa is open to guests until 5 May 2012 (papayaplayaproject.com).

First there was the prawn sandwich brigade, then the rubber chicken circuit. Now the corporate hospitality industry is bracing itself for the birth of the bamboo banquet.