These days bathroom scales come with solar panels, hyper-sensitive digital readings and some can even talk to you. Here, we weigh them up...

The family of a woman whose husband was convicted of murder even though her body was never found said they were "bitterly disappointed" today after he won an appeal.

Litter on the UK's beaches increased last year, fuelled by people flushing rubbish down the toilet instead of in the bin, the Marine Conservation Society (MCS) has said.

This week saw the launch of yet another Blue Cross sale at Debenhams, with up to 70 per cent off products across the store. Some of the best savings are to be found in the homewares department, with items such as the Bergen bonded leather recliner, reduced from £500 to £224, an Amelia bathroom towel set, down from £32 to £9.60, and the Clusterdown orthopaedic contoured pillow, reduced from £36 to £10.80, proving the top-selling items so far. Head over to http://ind.pn/bWzC4I for a full list of discounts.

A former altar boy accused of killing and chopping up an elderly vicar he lodged with said today he had touched him inappropriately while having a bath.

A 60-year-old man "disappeared without trace" after becoming involved in a love triangle with a woman half his age, the Old Bailey heard today.

A TV daredevil who tried to parachute off New York's Empire State Building can not set foot in the landmark again, a court ruled.

Chosen by Clementine Logan

Just what is the connection in some people's minds between reading and excretion? I knew a reviewer who could scarcely pass a literary judgement without a scatological reference or a quip that the book under review be kept in the smallest room. This tendency culminated in an elaborate metaphor involving stool consistency and tips for light reading matter for a short transit time, to weighty volumes for when you're planning to be in there a while. Ugh! I rang up to protest. "But you see," came the languid response, "in my family, putting a book in the loo is really rather a compliment."

What do women want from men? Oh, not much. Adoration, eternal loyalty, and all the bathroom surfaces to ourselves. Time, babies and the moon on a string. The list could go on forever, and there are probably as many different answers as there are women. But, after scrutinising the opposite sex for an observation period lasting my entire adult life, and consulting with members of my distinguished coven, I have drawn up this list of friendly hints under the working title "George, Don't Do That: but please do this, and this and this".