Why have we got ourselves into the silly position of thinking that every teacher has to be bought a present at the end of every school year?

Google has used its search page doodle to celebrate the 407th anniversary of the birth, in Leyden, Holland, of the Dutch painter Rembrandt van Rijn.

This week I scored such a beautiful goal at football, I really need to lay it down in print. It was as sweet as a plum; a dipping volley right off my laces that left the goalkeeper helpless – confused and gaping, like a teenaged giraffe coming face to face with a mirror for the first time. It was sublime. People need to be told about it.

It was Forrest Gump's momma who said life was like a box of chocolates because you never know what you're gonna get, and that's certainly rung true for Thorntons investors over the past four years.

After we had made 'Telstar'," the pianist Roger LaVern told me in 2009, "I thought it was a strange piece of music and I wasn't even sure if I liked it. When it started climbing the charts, I started to like it and now I find it absolutely incredible to think that I was involved with something so iconic."

The vogue for cutesy widdle phwases on the back of products, as pioneered by Innocent Smoothies, isn’t going away. It’s known as ‘wackaging’ – and it’s driving Will Coldwell mad

Serves 4

Whether you’re a rocket man or like your frozen treats in all shapes and sizes, we’ve got the right kit for the job.

Two of the world's biggest chocolate companies, Nestlé and Mars, have been charged in Canada with price-fixing.

Outlook Tough times for Wolseley, the multinational plumbers merchant, whose upbeat performance in the UK and the US was tarnished by the continuing struggles of the construction industry in Europe.

Home to Terry’s and Rowntree’s, York is inextricably linked to the world of chocolate, as a great new interactive attraction illustrates

Daniel Kitson’s new show is a reflection on reality, memory and our sense of self. Hardly wall-to-wall giggles, you might think, but this publicity-shy, TV-shunning, Perrier Award-winning comic’s talent lies in burrowing into the human psyche and dispensing profound nuggets through tales in which, more often than not, he is the hapless protagonist. After The Beginning, Before The End is like a TED talk with added LOLs.

A part-time house DJ from Hackney has been crowned this year’s MasterChef champion after preparing a knockout menu for the final challenge.