Nigel Harman who plays Simon Cowell and Simon Cowell at a photo-call for the X Factor musical I Can't Sing

X Factor musical I Can't Sing has a go at Simon Cowell

X Factor boss Simon Cowell said he knows he will "get it in the neck" in the new musical based on the hit singing show.

Live act: Coldplay

Poll: Was 2013 the most boring Brit Awards ever?

The Brit Awards used to be exciting. For one of the pop-iest events in the music calendar, they were even a bit rock 'n' roll. No one young enough to fit the Brit's target audience will remember this, of course - there's a reason why they hold the ceremony during half term - and that's the saddest thing of all. They don't even know what they're missing.

This week's wackiest web stories: Beer that's cheaper than water

Plus: Totally bus-ted, star-gazing bugs, Taiwan's new Barbie restaurant and if you Wannabe evicted (you better get with my friends)

From left: Lucy Phelps, Hannah John-Kamen, Dominique Provost- Chalkley and Siobhan Athwal

First night review: The Spice Girls' Viva Forever!, Piccadilly Theatre

Forget girl power, what you really, really want from this show is more silly moments

David Beckham joined LA Galaxy in 2007

Four directions home for Becks

When David Beckham announced that he's to leave the reigning MLS champions LA Galaxy for new climes, speculation was soon rife about the next stop in the Beckham roadshow. We thought we'd help Beckham with his decision with a compass point-friendly guide to potential new clubs. David, you're welcome:

Love: So Russell Brand, what DO you and the publicity-shy Geri Halliwell have in common?

Move on, definitely nothing to see here. If we all ignore them, they might just go away.

Bronze in mire over accounts

Black cabs fell into black holes today as Manganese Bronze — maker of the iconic London taxi — said it found accounting errors going back more than two years.

Cab maker Manganese in the mire

Black cabs fell into black holes yesterday as Manganese Bronze – maker of the well-known London taxi – said it had found accounting errors going back more than two years.

Melanie Brown, Melanie Chisolm, Geri Halliwell, Emma Bunton and Victoria Beckham at St Pancras yesterday

Spice Girls to perform at Olympics closing ceremony

The inventors of Girl Power are due to perform together for the first time in four years at the London 2012 Olympic closing ceremony.

Grace Dent: Don't be fooled by the 90s revival sdfghsdfgh

Alarm bells about the 90s revival went off for me when I was told last week that the Spice Girls actually made some important headway for feminism. Excuse me while I laugh up a lung. (Don't worry it's better off out anyway after all the damage I did it in the 90s smoking Marlboro Reds as it was cool.)

Geri Halliwell designs her own clothes

Geri Halliwell has always designed her own clothes.

Thompson gives the girls at her old school an English lesson

She has ingratiated herself with the nation's youth through her role as the somewhat unhinged Professor Sybil Trelawney in the Harry Potter films, but now actress Emma Thompson has had something of a swipe at the Muggle population of her own alma mater.

X Factor judging role for Spice Girl Geri Halliwell

Geri Halliwell is expected to add some extra spice to The X Factor by stepping in as a guest judge.

Career Services

Day In a Page

Burgundy, the River Rhone & Provence – MS Swiss Corona - seven nights from £999pp
Lake Maggiore, Orta and the Matterhorn – seven nights from £899pp
Sicily – seven nights from £939pp
Pompeii, Capri and the Bay of Naples - seven nights from £799pp
Istanbul Ephesus & Troy – six nights from £859pp
Mary Rose – two nights from £319pp
A new Russian revolution: Cracks start to appear in Putin’s Kremlin power bloc

A new Russian revolution

Cracks start to appear in Putin’s Kremlin power bloc
Eugene de Kock: Apartheid’s sadistic killer that his country cannot forgive

Apartheid’s sadistic killer that his country cannot forgive

The debate rages in South Africa over whether Eugene de Kock should ever be released from jail
Standing my ground: If sitting is bad for your health, what happens when you stay on your feet for a whole month?

Standing my ground

If sitting is bad for your health, what happens when you stay on your feet for a whole month?
Commonwealth Games 2014: Dai Greene prays for chance to rebuild after injury agony

Greene prays for chance to rebuild after injury agony

Welsh hurdler was World, European and Commonwealth champion, but then the injuries crept in
Israel-Gaza conflict: Secret report helps Israelis to hide facts

Patrick Cockburn: Secret report helps Israel to hide facts

The slickness of Israel's spokesmen is rooted in directions set down by pollster Frank Luntz
The man who dared to go on holiday

The man who dared to go on holiday

New York's mayor has taken a vacation - in a nation that has still to enforce paid leave, it caused quite a stir, reports Rupert Cornwell
Best comedians: How the professionals go about their funny business, from Sarah Millican to Marcus Brigstocke

Best comedians: How the professionals go about their funny business

For all those wanting to know how stand-ups keep standing, here are some of the best moments
The Guest List 2014: Forget the Man Booker longlist, Literary Editor Katy Guest offers her alternative picks

The Guest List 2014

Forget the Man Booker longlist, Literary Editor Katy Guest offers her alternative picks
Jokes on Hollywood: 'With comedy film audiences shrinking, it’s time to move on'

Jokes on Hollywood

With comedy film audiences shrinking, it’s time to move on
It's the best of British art... but not all is on display

It's the best of British art... but not all is on display

Voted for by the British public, the artworks on Art Everywhere posters may be the only place where they can be seen
Critic claims 'I was the inspiration for Blanche DuBois'

Critic claims 'I was the inspiration for Blanche DuBois'

Blanche Marvin reveals how Tennessee Williams used her name and an off-the-cuff remark to create an iconic character
Sometimes it's hard to be a literary novelist

Sometimes it's hard to be a literary novelist

Websites offering your ebooks for nothing is only the latest disrespect the modern writer is subjected to, says DJ Taylor
Edinburgh Fringe 2014: The comedy highlights, from Bridget Christie to Jack Dee

Edinburgh Fringe 2014

The comedy highlights, from Bridget Christie to Jack Dee
Dame Jenny Abramsky: 'We have to rethink. If not, museums and parks will close'

Dame Jenny Abramsky: 'We have to rethink. If not, museums and parks will close'

The woman stepping down as chair of the Heritage Lottery Fund is worried