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A look at the deals which cost nothing that transpired into great things or a complete catastophe

Football: Gascoigne giveaway

Bradford City 1 Mills 60 Middlesbrough 1 Ricard 13 Half-time: 0-1 Attendance: 17,708

Football: Bad-tempered derby sees more brawl than ball

Middlesbrough 1 Sunderland 1

Football: Kewell keeps his cool as Leeds stay on the boil

Leeds United 2 Middlesbrough 0

Football: Boro's cabinet is bare

Middlesbrough 3 Southampton 2

Football: Ziege's zeal sets example to Gazza

Middlesbrough 3 Pallister 17 Gascoigne pen 76, Deane 78 Southampton 2 Kachloul 15, Pahars 55 Half-time: 1-1 Attendance: 32,165

Football: Robson's men routed by Heskey

Middlesbrough 0 Leicester City 3

Football: Ricard braces Wimbledon for hard times

Wimbledon 2 Middlesbrough 3

Football: Middlesbrough 0 Bradford City 1 - Jewell glitters with pride

WHEN YOU'VE been out of the top flight for ages there's no better way of celebrating your return than with a last-minute winner on your first day back, as both Bradford City and Dean Saunders will confirm.

Football: Saunders jets in for flying start

Welcome to the Premiership: Watford and Sunderland given a rough ride as Bradford make history

Football: Gazza matches Ince for bite

Huddersfield Town 2

Football: Yorke takes United to top as Keane limps off

Middlesbrough 0 Manchester United 1 Yorke 45 Attendance: 34,665

Football: Six-shooting Gunners hit the top

FA Premiership: Kanu and Anelka irrepressible as goal spree threatens United's goal difference

Football: Gascoigne nips in for a swift half

Blackburn Rovers 0

Football: Atkinson fury at Forest `stupidity'

Nottingham Forest 1 Freedman 37 Middlesbrough 2 Ricard 30, Deane 87 Half-time: 1-1 Attendance: 21,468

Football: Boro's misery deepens

No pace, no points and no plusses for Gascoigne. Fortunately, there is no Keegan either; Sheffield Wednesday 3 Middlesbrough 1 Booth 11, 80 Mustoe 78 Sonner 77 Half-time: 1-0 Attendance: 24,534
News
people'It can last and it's terrifying'
Sport
Radamel Falcao
footballManchester United agree loan deal for Monaco striker Falcao
Sport
Louis van Gaal, Radamel Falcao, Arturo Vidal, Mats Hummels and Javier Hernandez
footballFalcao, Hernandez, Welbeck and every deal live as it happens
Sport
footballFeaturing Bart Simpson
News
peopleA spokesperson said the support group was 'extremely disappointed'
News
i100
Life and Style
techIf those brochure kitchens look a little too perfect to be true, well, that’s probably because they are
Arts and Entertainment
Alex Kapranos of Franz Ferdinand performs live
music Pro-independence show to take place four days before vote
News
news Video - hailed as 'most original' since Benedict Cumberbatch's
Arts and Entertainment
booksNovelist takes aim at Orwell's rules for writing plain English
Career Services

Day In a Page

Burgundy, the River Rhone & Provence – MS Swiss Corona - seven nights from £999pp
Lake Maggiore, Orta and the Matterhorn – seven nights from £899pp
Sicily – seven nights from £939pp
Pompeii, Capri and the Bay of Naples - seven nights from £799pp
Istanbul Ephesus & Troy – six nights from £859pp
Mary Rose – two nights from £319pp
Alexander Fury: The designer names to look for at fashion week this season

The big names to look for this fashion week

This week, designers begin to show their spring 2015 collections in New York
Will Self: 'I like Orwell's writing as much as the next talented mediocrity'

'I like Orwell's writing as much as the next talented mediocrity'

Will Self takes aim at Orwell's rules for writing plain English
Meet Afghanistan's middle-class paint-ballers

Meet Afghanistan's middle-class paint-ballers

Toy guns proving a popular diversion in a country flooded with the real thing
Al Pacino wows Venice

Al Pacino wows Venice

Ham among the brilliance as actor premieres two films at festival
Neil Lawson Baker interview: ‘I’ve gained so much from art. It’s only right to give something back’.

Neil Lawson Baker interview

‘I’ve gained so much from art. It’s only right to give something back’.
The other Mugabe who is lining up for the Zimbabwean presidency

The other Mugabe who is lining up for the Zimbabwean presidency

Wife of President Robert Mugabe appears to have her sights set on succeeding her husband
The model of a gadget launch: Cultivate an atmosphere of mystery and excitement to sell stuff people didn't realise they needed

The model for a gadget launch

Cultivate an atmosphere of mystery and excitement to sell stuff people didn't realise they needed
Alice Roberts: She's done pretty well, for a boffin without a beard

She's done pretty well, for a boffin without a beard

Alice Roberts talks about her new book on evolution - and why her early TV work drew flak from (mostly male) colleagues
Get well soon, Joan Rivers - an inspiration, whether she likes it or not

Get well soon, Joan Rivers

She is awful. But she's also wonderful, not in spite of but because of the fact she's forever saying appalling things, argues Ellen E Jones
Doctor Who Into the Dalek review: A classic sci-fi adventure with all the spectacle of a blockbuster

A fresh take on an old foe

Doctor Who Into the Dalek more than compensated for last week's nonsensical offering
Fashion walks away from the celebrity runway show

Fashion walks away from the celebrity runway show

As the collections start, fashion editor Alexander Fury finds video and the internet are proving more attractive
Meet the stars of TV's Wolf Hall... and it's not the cast of the Tudor trilogy

Meet the stars of TV's Wolf Hall...

... and it's not the cast of the Tudor trilogy
Weekend at the Asylum: Europe's biggest steampunk convention heads to Lincoln

Europe's biggest steampunk convention

Jake Wallis Simons discovers how Victorian ray guns and the martial art of biscuit dunking are precisely what the 21st century needs
Don't swallow the tripe – a user's guide to weasel words

Don't swallow the tripe – a user's guide to weasel words

Lying is dangerous and unnecessary. A new book explains the strategies needed to avoid it. John Rentoul on the art of 'uncommunication'
Daddy, who was Richard Attenborough? Was the beloved thespian the last of the cross-generation stars?

Daddy, who was Richard Attenborough?

The atomisation of culture means that few of those we regard as stars are universally loved any more, says DJ Taylor