A face full of snails might not be your average person's idea of an expensive salon treatment, but that's just what Japan's high society have been shelling out for lately - at a cost of £65 for a five minute session.

A sort of bestiary of myth, legend and animal analogy, Wilderness uses wildlife traits as jumping-off points for enigmatic tales in typical Handsome Family manner.

If this was supposed to be the preliminary sketch for an Epsom masterpiece, then for now Liber Nauticus remains closer to an oil tanker than a dashing ocean clipper. Nonetheless she finds herself disputing favouritism for the Investec Oaks, bookmakers having taken an indulgent view of the heavy weather she made of her trial here.

Serves 4

Police were surprised it hadn't already detonated

Dinner time for daddy makes your flesh creep

The squid can eject water through a nozzle nea  its head as a form of jet propulsion

Musselburgh trials day does not quite have the same ring to it as Cheltenham trials day, but racing is nevertheless most grateful to the enterprise shown at the Scottish racecourse and those at other venues responsible for keeping the jumping show properly on the road over the next few days.

Not up for the Costa? Don't worry there's plenty others to choose from

Here it is, the monster of the depths, the sea-creature of nightmares, filmed for the first time in its natural habitat: the giant squid.

Tom Leece is Film and TV editor at Fourth & Main 

“As if we didn't have enough to worry about with terrorists and bandits,” said one disgruntled Karachi resident. “Now we have brain-eating amoeba to contend with.” Indeed, the latest threat in the notoriously crime-ridden city is not robbery or sectarian violence, but a waterborne organism that causes a form of meningitis.

It sounds like a plot from a spoof horror film, but ever since a South American mollusc, the innocent-sounding apple snail, was accidentally released into the rice fields of the river Ebro Delta in 2009, for local farmers, the nightmare scenario of a plague of voraciously hungry snails has been sadly all too true.