In a BBC profile 'Boris Johnson: The Irresistible Rise' London's mayor also reveals his ambition to be British Prime Minister

Always ahead, but without the hat

The vindictiveness of American justice never ceases to astound. Fifty-year sentences under the three-strikes rule for stealing a slice of pizza; chain gangs and weevil 'n' maggot suppers in Alabama; a new craze for charging pregnant drug addicts who miscarry with murder ... we look across the ocean and recoil at the barbarity.

Fans of The Apprentice will have noted that this week's victim of the "boardroom" was Glen, a senior design engineer. "I've never come across an engineer who can turn his hands to business," raged Lord Sugar, his face wrinkling like an angry testicle. "You're fired." Sir James Dyson, engineer and entrepreneur, begs to differ. "Britain should value its engineers," he said yesterday. "It is engineers who will develop new British technology that we can sell around the world." Sir James was, of course, far too polite to mention that his estimated net worth happens to be £1.45bn – almost double that of Lord Sugar (£770m).

On intimate terms with AXZ and KML

He has penned biographies of Syd Barrett, and Nigel Dempster. Now Tim Willis turns his attention to making later life seem sexy.

Rachel Johnson has written to contributors of The Lady, apologising for a "payment drought". "I just wanted to say how sorry I am that it's taken The Lady so long to stump up all this year, and how grateful I am that you have continued to file .... Many of you have kindly avoided pestering me with your plaints for which I am, I admit, grateful.

Ian Burrell listens to the argument for intelligence

If you ask me...

Voices of: Dan Aykroyd, Justin Timberlake, Anna Faris

Notebook

For reasons delayed until the final item (no peeping), I nipped into the local newsagent on Saturday to ask if he had a copy of a magazine called The Lady. "Everything we have like that," said the Sri Lankan guy, waving towards the top shelf, "is up there." I hereby apologise to him for cackling, because if Rachel Johnson remains its Editor for much longer he will look admirably prescient.

Rant

Who could forget Gaga's gory frock, the X Factor talent, or spring's very strange political liaison (and we don't mean the coalition). Matthew Bell tests your knowledge of the news, people and stinging insults that make the past 12 months a time to remember. (Answers at the bottom of the page)