Travel: Passport - Janet Street-Porter
When the landing gear of the Cessna plane she and her husband were in failed to lower, they wrote their wills on an empty film packet as the shark-infested waters swept by below them
Sunday 25 April 1999
Related articles
Tim and I wrote our wills on Kodak packets as we flew over the shark- infested waters. It took hours and then the owner told us to do loop the loops to try to bump out the front landing gear. We went through about 20 minutes of aerobatics and they still didn't pop out. Eventually we dumped all the fuel, the pilot cut the engines and told us to move all the equipment out of the back of the plane and crawl into the tail to balance things out. We landed on the back wheels and the plane flipped up on to its nose and stuck in the asphalt. The emergency services told us to jump out and run for cover in case it blew up. It didn't. Afterwards we went to the control tower and the air traffic controller said it had been a really disappointing crash.
Since then I've never been afraid of flying, but a few years later I went to Jamaica with Neil Tennant, on a scheduled BA flight. We got on board to find Paul and Linda McCartney and all their kids, Mick Hucknell and his entourage and a Channel 4 film crew who were flying out to do their New Year's Eve concert. And sitting downstairs were all these pop stars who were going to be in the programme. I've never seen so many pop stars on one plane. I thought, if this plane goes down I won't even be a footnote: I'll be an also-on-board.
To relax I love to walk or go sailing. My holidays are a bit schizophrenic. I'm either walking seven hours a day, or I'm lounging on the back of someone else's boat with a drink. I like isolated places, places that you can get to only by water or a long trek. I love St Vincent and have been a couple of times, although I rarely go to the same place twice.
For the TV programme As the Crow Flies, I walked 350 miles from Edinburgh Observatory to Greenwich Observatory, in a straight line. In order to do this I ended up walking through people's back gardens. I also walked through a very deep river with all these tin cans and bits of wire at the bottom. But the worst bit of the walk was the Pennines. It was so wet and to keep to a straight line we had to walk through bogs. Then you've got to lose all sense of shame as you go into some isolated pub and start stripping off and hanging your clothes up around the fire to dry.
What I hate about travel are mosquitoes because they always find that bit of your body with no cream on it. Once in Sri Lanka I was bitten by so many mosquitoes I was forced to lie in a bath of cold water for hours. My speciality is to get a really good suntan and to go for a walk, with shorts instead of long trousers, to show off brown legs. I always come back covered in mosquito bites, bramble scratches and ticks. Often when I return from holidays I look so bad that my friends greet me with: "And you paid money to go and do that."
Janet Street-Porter's book, 'As the Crow Flies', is published by Metro at pounds 8.99. The TV series is showing on Fridays on BBC 2.
- 1 Tears and cheers as David Beckham ends glittering career after helping PSG to final win
- 2 Heading for America? Prepare for the longest US immigration queues ever
- 3 You thought Ryanair's attendants had it bad? Wait 'til you hear about their pilots
- 4 Cameron goes to war with press over 'swivel-eyed loons' slur
- 5 It’s official: thanks to Stephen Hawking's Israel boycott, anti-Semitism is no more
Get your summer started with British Military Fitness
BMF is the UK’s biggest and best loved outdoor fitness classes
Visit York
Find out what The Independent's resident travel expert has to say about one of the most beautiful small cities in the world
Enter the latest Independent competitions
Win anything from gadgets to five-star holidays on our competitions and offers page.
Business videos from commercial thought leaders
Watch the best in the business world give their insights into the world of business.
iJobs Travel
Food Technology Teacher
£26400 - £36000 per annum: Randstad Education Maidstone: An Independant school...
Travel Consultant - Career In The Travel Industry!! Full Training Provided!!
£22k-£25k + comm + benefits: Blue Travel Solutions: LOOKING FOR A CAREER IN TH...
Caribbean Specialists !! Excellent Salary!!!
£26k-£29k + excellent comm: Blue Travel Solutions: We have a high-end luxury t...
Travel Agent
£23000 - £27000 per annum + (£15K + Uncapped Commission & Benefits): Flight Ce...
Day In a Page
The price of pacifism
Jason Isaacs: Groupies, theatre bores and James Bond
Sealand: 'Micronation' or illegal fortress?
Legend of James Hunt has set Hollywood hearts racing
Macklemore: 'I don't have moderation'
Don't be shy: Bill Granger's Sri Lankan recipes
Gordon Ramsay's worst nightmare: A restaurant he cannot save











Comments