Claudia Winkleman: Take It From Me

'The Sex and the City movie is a bit like the All Saints comeback and the return of the Jammy Dodger – all wrong'
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The Independent Online

So, apart from the two main topics of discussion – the first being, "Of course the wife bloody knew"; the second, "Jeez, is that bloke off the telly really the Mayor of London?" – my friends and I spent most of the weekend talking about the forthcoming Sex and the City movie. We're serious thinkers, us lot. Ahem.

Anyway, I, for one, am worried. Yes, of course I love little Sarah Jessica Parker. I love the fact that when she accepts awards, she thanks everyone she's ever met and inanimate objects that have "been kind to her". And I love the fact that she hasn't had a flesh-coloured mole removed from her forehead (I'm not making it up; have a closer look next time she's on the screen). These things make me think she's down to earth. Ish.

Indeed, Sex and the City highlighted the importance of female friendships, and showed the world that it was hip to be single. Men became just dates or flings, or just something to do on a Thursday. Women who hadn't met "the one" were comforted by the fact that these four beautiful women hadn't either. The character of Samantha Jones proved that women over the age of 40 could be magnificently sexy and attractive to men of all ages. All good. All tick.

There's no doubt the show also taught us girls how important a pair of, uh, shoes can be, and Carrie Bradshaw's quirky style made faux-fur coats and odd mixes of old-fashioned prints and extremely high heels cool. Again, hooray for vintage.

And then it was all over. Rumours of rows between the actresses flew around, and that was it. We were left with reruns on Paramount Comedy, and in our heads, it was smarter than it probably was and funnier than it probably was. Girlfriends would discuss which character they most resembled. People said I was like Charlotte – the dorky, prudish, annoying one. Yes, you're right, I never spoke to them again.

And in our heads, it was a brilliant era that's gone – and for those of us who were the right age to relish in it, it felt like a privilege. People feel the same way about Porridge (no, really they do – it's a total mystery to me as well) and Friends and Blackadder. If you were there, and you watched and laughed and talked about a particular episode the next day, then you were riding a wave with a whole group of people. It was like being in a community – the SATC gang was obsessed by Diptyque candles, Manolo Blahnik shoes, and the annoying habits of men.

And now it's coming back. To the big screen. I know that inside I should be screaming with glee. I think I should probably be ordering a cosmopolitan, and wearing Marc Jacobs, and gossiping about what I think will have happened to the four characters with my girlfriends. The right thing to be doing would be to organise a girls' night out to the cinema and then on to somewhere we can push rocket around our plates and down fancy lemon-drop martinis.

But here's the problem – it was perfect, it was great, and now it feels slightly wrong. What? They ran out of money so they created a final 135-minute episode that I have to pay 13 quid to go and see? And you know the plot without even seeing the trailer. It's a dream wedding between Carrie and Big, and then he doesn't show up, and you can imagine the rest...

I think all reunions feel a bit like sex with an ex-boyfriend – it should be such a good idea. As you sit ready to re-enter a relationship, you make a list of the upsides in your head:

1. You know each other's bodies.

2. You don't have to go through the, "So, where do your parents live?".

3. You know that you're not going to be broken-hearted, because you left each other before and survived.

4. Why the hell not?

5. It's easier than finding someone new.

And so you make the call and you're sitting in Café Rouge and you think, "Oh, there was a reason that this had to finish. We were done here". (The Café Rouge thing probably wouldn't work in his favour either, but you know what I'm saying.)

Sex and the City: The Movie – a bit like the All Saints comeback, and the return of the Jammy Dodger, it feels a little staged and all wrong. The actresses didn't make a massive success of it out on their own. Kristin Davis is Charlotte, Cynthia Nixon is Miranda, etc, and they couldn't find anything else to do, so they thought they'd make another quick buck at the box office. Of course I'm going to see the film, and of course my girlfriends and I will talk about it for a few weekends to come, so I'm sure that it will be a success – I'm just not sure it's a good idea.

As Carrie would say, "When is a relationship finally over?". She'd make a comment about the fall and leaves and New York and starting afresh. And I'd say that relationships, like television series, however zeitgeisty, can jump the shark. Well guess what, girls – a great white is just behind you.

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