Cooper Brown: Driving

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The Independent Online

Not as much support as I’d hoped for my anti-politically correct brigade stance in yesterday’s diary. People really seem to be angry about this stuff. I rang Ben and we headed off to the Groucho for some liquid comfort. I love Ben. He is blissfully unconcerned about anything but his own happiness.

This is the attitude we should all have. The country would be a better place. Ben then suggested a B52 session. We downed about seven and things suddenly looked great. Ben is setting up a celebrity rally that he wants to go from Manchester to Marrakech. I asked him why on earth would anybody want to start in Manchester? He said that it sounded better with both places starting with M. I suggested Marylebone and it was like I’d cracked the theory of relativity. Ben was so happy, as he said a lot of people weren’t signing up due to the Manchester thing. I think I might do it.

Obviously I wouldn’t want to take the Quattroporte, as it would get screwed up on the shitty roads down there, but if anybody wants to lend the Coop a seriously nice four-wheel drive thing then I’m open to offers. I’ve got to get a co-driver as well. Ben said chick celebrities are always up or this kind of thing. I have my eyes on one in particular, but not for her driving skills.

We staggered out of the club and went to Boujis, where I said something offensive to Prince Harry. That’s what Ben tells me on a text this morning, anyway – will find out more… Cooper Out.

Twitter – @icooperbrown