Dylan Jones: 'If you had to explain a disappearance, or had to rate an evening out, a simple ‘Groucho’ would suffice'

Share
Related Topics

So there we were, Frank Dunphy and myself, sitting in one of the upstairs bars in the Groucho Club, swapping war stories. Did I remember the night that ****** ran through the club naked (apart from a half drunk martini); did he remember the night ****** *** was found downstairs in the ***** covered in *******? Oh yes, we did. Didn't we just.

The disyllable "Groucho" was once used to cover a multitude of sins, was once used to explain a lengthy or protracted absence (and sometimes a sabbatical). If you were forced to explain a suspicious disappearance, or asked to rate an evening out, a simple "Groucho" would suffice. This meant that you had probably drunk your body weight in sauvignon blanc, left your wife for a transsexual wrestler and then woken up in Berlin covered in tattoos. Or you could have gone for a perfectly respectable lunch in, say, Bibendum, and then found yourself many hours later – after a lengthy sojourn in Dean Street – somewhere in Holland Park, with a Belgian conceptual artist, the bass player of an international rock combo and the editor of a national newspaper.

"Groucho."

And now it appears to be back. The Groucho Club, that is. With something of a vengeance. Since opening in 1985 the club has suffered various heavy assaults from the trenches, as members' clubs have sprung up in almost every desirable postcode. Once the Groucho was your only choice, but then there was Blacks, Green Street, Soho House, the Electric, George, the Ivy Club, Shoreditch House and all points in between and above and beyond. Loyalties were split. But it now looks like the Groucho Club may be back. Evenings that might have once ended in east or west London are now finishing (and I use the word with caution) in Dean Street, and half a dozen times in the last month – after concerts, parties, dinners and (yes) once even the theatre – my own personal party sat nav has taken me deep into the wilds of Soho.

And you know what, it feels good to be back. So – carefully, without spilling your drink – repeat after me: "Groucho".

Dylan Jones is the editor of 'GQ'

React Now

iJobs Job Widget
iJobs General

Mobile App/IOS Developer (C#, ASP.NET, .NET, MVC)

£50000 - £60000 per annum + Benefits + Bonus: Harrington Starr: Mobile App/IOS...

Front End Developer-JavaScript, Angular J.S, HTML, CSS, ASP.NET

£40000 - £45000 per annum + Benefits + Bonus: Harrington Starr: Front End Deve...

Associate CXL Consultant

£40000 - £60000 per annum + BONUS + BENEFITS: Harrington Starr: CXL, Triple Po...

Associate CXL Consultant

£40000 - £60000 per annum + BONUS + BENEFITS: Harrington Starr: CXL, Triple Po...

Day In a Page

Read Next
 

i Editor's Letter: Only a game? Far from it

Oliver Duff Oliver Duff
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi speaking at the Grand Mosque in Mosul  

The al-Baghdadi doctrine: leading British Muslims offer their response

Independent Voices
The true Gaza back-story that the Israelis aren’t telling this week

The true Gaza back-story that the Israelis aren’t telling this week

A future Palestine state will have no borders and be an enclave within Israel, surrounded on all sides by Israeli-held territory, says Robert Fisk
A History of the First World War in 100 Moments: The German people demand an end to the fighting

A History of the First World War in 100 Moments

The German people demand an end to the fighting
New play by Oscar Wilde's grandson reveals what the Irish wit said at his trials

New play reveals what Oscar Wilde said at trials

For a century, what Wilde actually said at his trials was a mystery. But the recent discovery of shorthand notes changed that. Now his grandson Merlin Holland has turned them into a play
Can scientists save the world's sea life from

Can scientists save our sea life?

By the end of the century, the only living things left in our oceans could be plankton and jellyfish. Alex Renton meets the scientists who are trying to turn the tide
Richard III, Trafalgar Studios, review: Martin Freeman gives highly intelligent performance

Richard III review

Martin Freeman’s psychotic monarch is big on mockery but wanting in malice
Hollywood targets Asian audiences as US films enjoy record-breaking run at Chinese box office

Hollywood targets Asian audiences

The world's second biggest movie market is fast becoming the Hollywood studios' most crucial
Grindr founder Joel Simkhai: 'I've found love on my dating app - and my mum keeps trying to hook me up!'

Grindr founder Joel Simkhai: 'I've found love on my dating app'

Five years on from its launch and Grindr is the world's most popular dating app for gay men. Its founder Joel Simkhai answers his critics, describes his isolation as a child
Autocorrect has its uses but it can go rogue with embarrassing results - so is it time to ditch it?

Is it time to ditch autocorrect?

Matthew J X Malady persuaded friends to message manually instead, but failed to factor in fat fingers and drunk texting
10 best girls' summer dresses

Frock chick: 10 best girls' summer dresses

Get them ready for the holidays with these cool and pretty options 
Westminster’s dark secret: Adultery, homosexuality, sadomasochism and abuse of children were all seemingly lumped together

Westminster’s dark secret

Adultery, homosexuality, sadomasochism and abuse of children were all seemingly lumped together
A History of the First World War in 100 Moments: Dulce et decorum est - a life cut short for a poet whose work achieved immortality

A History of the First World War in 100 Moments

Dulce et decorum est: a life cut short for a poet whose work achieved immortality
Google tells popular music website to censor album cover art in 'sexually explicit content' ban

Naked censorship?

The strange case of Google, the music website and the nudity take-down requests
Howzat! 8 best cricket bats

Howzat! 8 best cricket bats

As England take on India at Trent Bridge, here is our pick of the high-performing bats to help you up your run-count this summer 
Brazil vs Germany World Cup 2014 comment: David Luiz falls from leader figure to symbol of national humiliation

David Luiz falls from leader figure to symbol of national humiliation

Captain appears to give up as shocking 7-1 World Cup semi-final defeat threatens ramifications in Brazil