John Walsh: The habits some monks get into...

BTW...

Share
Related Topics

* Vatican spoilsports have cracked down on a Roman monastery. Twenty monks from Santa Croce Basilica – built to house nails from the True Cross – were booted out after evidence was found of "lifestyles... probably not in keeping with that of a monk". Such as? Well, their abbot was a former fashion designer with a cult following. Among their showbiz worshippers was Madonna (no, not the mother of God, duh), and a former nightclub dancer used to entertain them with her "holy dance", writhing before the altar clutching a crucifix. Apart from that, I can't see what they're complaining about.

* Fans of Pulp Fiction will recall the dialogue between Jules and Vincent about whether giving your boss's wife a foot massage is tantamount to having sex, and as likely to get you into trouble. A similar conversation will be heard in a French court when a cabinet minister, Georges Tron, faces accusations of sexual harrassment by two women employees. He allegedly offered them regular "therapeutic reflexology sessions" on their feet. They claim he was up to no good. We wait to see whether the court agrees with Jules that sex and foot masaging are indeed in the same ballpark.

* Scientists at Imperial College London have emerged after three months of measuring an electron with hot news: it's round. Rounder than a tennis ball, a hula hoop or Ken Clarke's tummy, this is one really round object. It's the roundest thing around. If it were the size of the solar system, any deviation from perfect roundiosity would be less than a hair's breadth. "We have measured the shape very precisely," said the team leader, "It is very, very round." Got that? No way was that three months wasted.

* A precedent has been set in a Chicago court. During a small-claims dispute over a used car, attorney Thomas Gooch noticed jurors' eyes were on the woman with a huge cleavage beside him. He accused his rival lawyer of planting her there to distract the jury from his address. "I like large breasts," he confessed, "but I object to somebody I don't think is a qualified paralegal sitting at the counsel table... dressed in such a fashion as to draw attention to herself." He asked the judge to banish her, but his rival proved the woman was his "paralegal assistant" and she stayed. Courtrooms could be much more fun in future.

React Now

Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
SPONSORED FEATURES
iJobs Job Widget
iJobs General

Recruitment Genius: Senior Environmental Adviser - Maternity Cover

£37040 - £43600 per annum: Recruitment Genius: The UK's export credit agency a...

Recruitment Genius: CBM & Lubrication Technician

£25000 - £27500 per annum: Recruitment Genius: This company provides a compreh...

Recruitment Genius: Care Worker - Residential Emergency Service

£16800 - £19500 per annum: Recruitment Genius: Would you like to join an organ...

Recruitment Genius: Senior Landscaper

£25000 - £28000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: In the last five years this com...

Day In a Page

Read Next
Labour's Jeremy Corbyn arrives to take part in a Labour party leadership final debate, at the Sage in Gateshead, England, Thursday, Sept. 3  

Jeremy Corbyn is here to stay and the Labour Party is never going to look the same again

Andrew Grice
Serena Williams  

As Stella Creasy and Serena Williams know, a woman's achievements are still judged on appearance

Holly Baxter
Refugee crisis: David Cameron lowered the flag for the dead king of Saudi Arabia - will he do the same honour for little Aylan Kurdi?

Cameron lowered the flag for the dead king of Saudi Arabia...

But will he do the same honour for little Aylan Kurdi, asks Robert Fisk
Our leaders lack courage in this refugee crisis. We are shamed by our European neighbours

Our leaders lack courage in this refugee crisis. We are shamed by our European neighbours

Humanity must be at the heart of politics, says Jeremy Corbyn
Joe Biden's 'tease tour': Could the US Vice-President be testing the water for a presidential run?

Joe Biden's 'tease tour'

Could the US Vice-President be testing the water for a presidential run?
Britain's 24-hour culture: With the 'leisured society' a distant dream we're working longer and less regular hours than ever

Britain's 24-hour culture

With the 'leisured society' a distant dream we're working longer and less regular hours than ever
Diplomacy board game: Treachery is the way to win - which makes it just like the real thing

The addictive nature of Diplomacy

Bullying, betrayal, aggression – it may be just a board game, but the family that plays Diplomacy may never look at each other in the same way again
Lady Chatterley's Lover: Racy underwear for fans of DH Lawrence's equally racy tome

Fashion: Ooh, Lady Chatterley!

Take inspiration from DH Lawrence's racy tome with equally racy underwear
8 best children's clocks

Tick-tock: 8 best children's clocks

Whether you’re teaching them to tell the time or putting the finishing touches to a nursery, there’s a ticker for that
Charlie Austin: Queens Park Rangers striker says ‘If the move is not right, I’m not going’

Charlie Austin: ‘If the move is not right, I’m not going’

After hitting 18 goals in the Premier League last season, the QPR striker was the great non-deal of transfer deadline day. But he says he'd preferred another shot at promotion
Isis profits from destruction of antiquities by selling relics to dealers - and then blowing up the buildings they come from to conceal the evidence of looting

How Isis profits from destruction of antiquities

Robert Fisk on the terrorist group's manipulation of the market to increase the price of artefacts
Labour leadership: Andy Burnham urges Jeremy Corbyn voters to think again in last-minute plea

'If we lose touch we’ll end up with two decades of the Tories'

In an exclusive interview, Andy Burnham urges Jeremy Corbyn voters to think again in last-minute plea
Tunisia fears its Arab Spring could be reversed as the new regime becomes as intolerant of dissent as its predecessor

The Arab Spring reversed

Tunisian protesters fear that a new law will whitewash corrupt businessmen and officials, but they are finding that the new regime is becoming as intolerant of dissent as its predecessor
King Arthur: Legendary figure was real and lived most of his life in Strathclyde, academic claims

Academic claims King Arthur was real - and reveals where he lived

Dr Andrew Breeze says the legendary figure did exist – but was a general, not a king
Who is Oliver Bonas and how has he captured middle-class hearts?

Who is Oliver Bonas?

It's the first high-street store to pay its staff the living wage, and it saw out the recession in style
Earth has 'lost more than half its trees' since humans first started cutting them down

Axe-wielding Man fells half the world’s trees – leaving us just 422 each

However, the number of trees may be eight times higher than previously thought
60 years of Scalextric: Model cars are now stuffed with as much tech as real ones

60 years of Scalextric

Model cars are now stuffed with as much tech as real ones