Miles Kington: If you want to get rich, don't marry a divorce lawyer

Most husbands are inexperienced, first-time husbands. Most divorce lawyers are hard as nails. A pre-nup with a lawyer? Fat chance

Share
Related Topics

Ever since the recent historic rulings on wives being divorced from wealthy men, I have been deluged by letters from anxious women. Some, of course, are merely anxious to marry me and get their hands on my fortune, but most of them have genuine worries about their prospects, so today I have asked a divorce specialist to help sort them out.

Let's go!

Q. Before I met and married my husband, I was a simple secretary in his law firm. He made me give up my secretarial career in order to be a wife to him and a mother to his children. In order to combat boredom and keep my brain working, I started writing fiction, and I am now lucky enough to be a best-selling women's author under an assumed name.

His career has also flourished, but now he has met another woman and wishes to bring our marriage to an end. Naturally, I wish to take him to the cleaners, but as I am now very wealthy from my writing, I do not have a very clear claim - after all, my career has only flourished since I got married, and prior to that I did not have a career at all, so the court might take the view that it was marrying him that gave me the incentive to get rich.

My husband, by the way, has no idea that I am a published writer.

Do you think I have a good chance of getting my hands on a chunk of his money?

A. No. But I do think you have a cracking plot for your next novel.

Q. Talking to wives who have been through the divorce courts seeking compensation, I find that they all advise making a pre-nuptial agreement, which, though not legally binding, sways the judge a lot. But they all say that whatever sums they do secure, most of it, alas, goes in legal fees to their grasping lawyers.

As I intend to get married shortly to a very wealthy man whom I hope to divorce a few years later, it has occurred to me that perhaps my best course of action would be to sign a pre-nuptial agreement now with the lawyer I hope to use during my divorce case, limiting the depredations he will make on my winnings. I mean, my settlement. What are my prospects of doing this?

A. None at all. Most husbands are inexperienced, first-time husbands. Most divorce lawyers are hard-bitten and hard as nails. A pre-nup with a lawyer? Fat chance.

Q. As a matter of interest, how do the wives of divorce lawyers fare?

A. Nobody knows. All women who marry divorce lawyers sign a pre-nuptial agreement never to say anything.

Q. Is it possible for me to divorce my husband before the World Cup starts and marry him again after England is knocked out?

A. That is a very shallow and frivolous inquiry. Marriage is about money, madam. If money is not involved, I am not interested and nor should you be.

Q. Before I got married, I had a flourishing career in public relations. I had started my own firm, which rose to have an annual turnover of several million pounds. Then I got married to a financial journalist.

A. And you gave up your career to further his progress?

Q. No. He gave up his work as a financial journalist in order to look after our home and bring up our children.

A. Ah. And now he wants a divorce, and a smacking great compensation pay-out from your fortune?

Q. No. We were unable to have children, so he now wants to go back to work as a financial journalist.

A. I see. And you don't want to let him go back to work?

Q. No, I am quite happy to let him do so.

A. So what is the problem?

Q. No problem at all. I just thought it would be nice to hear from a happily married pair.

A. Madam, you are a trouble-maker and the sort of person who would drive a divorce lawyer to drink. Thank goodness there are not many like you.

Thinking of taking hubby to the cleaners? Just drop us a line

React Now

Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
iJobs Job Widget
iJobs General

Energy Markets Analyst

£400000 Per Annum: The Green Recruitment Company: Job Title: Energy Markets An...

Junior Web Analyst – West Sussex – Up to £35k DOE

£30000 - £35000 Per Annum Plus excellent benefits: Clearwater People Solutions...

Nursery Manager

£22000 - £23000 per annum: Randstad Education Bristol: We are currently recrui...

Web Analyst – Permanent – Up to £40k - London

£35000 - £40000 Per Annum: Clearwater People Solutions Ltd: We are currently r...

Day In a Page

Read Next
 

Letter from the Personal Finance Editor: Cutting out the middle man could spell disaster for employees and consumers alike

Simon Read
Bono and Apple CEO Tim Cook announced U2's surprise new album at the iPhone 6 launch  

Metacritic and Rotten Tomatoes tell you what to think. Don't let them

Memphis Barker
Mystery of the Ground Zero wedding photo

A shot in the dark

Mystery of the wedding photo from Ground Zero
His life, the universe and everything

His life, the universe and everything

New biography sheds light on comic genius of Douglas Adams
Save us from small screen superheroes

Save us from small screen superheroes

Shows like Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D are little more than marketing tools
Reach for the skies

Reach for the skies

From pools to football pitches, rooftop living is looking up
These are the 12 best hotel spas in the UK

12 best hotel spas in the UK

Some hotels go all out on facilities; others stand out for the sheer quality of treatments
These Iranian-controlled Shia militias used to specialise in killing American soldiers. Now they are fighting Isis, backed up by US airstrikes

Widespread fear of Isis is producing strange bedfellows

Iranian-controlled Shia militias that used to kill American soldiers are now fighting Isis, helped by US airstrikes
Topshop goes part Athena poster, part last spring Prada

Topshop goes part Athena poster, part last spring Prada

Shoppers don't come to Topshop for the unique
How to make a Lego masterpiece

How to make a Lego masterpiece

Toy breaks out of the nursery and heads for the gallery
Meet the ‘Endies’ – city dwellers who are too poor to have fun

Meet the ‘Endies’ – city dwellers who are too poor to have fun

Urbanites are cursed with an acronym pointing to Employed but No Disposable Income or Savings
Paisley’s decision to make peace with IRA enemies might remind the Arabs of Sadat

Ian Paisley’s decision to make peace with his IRA enemies

His Save Ulster from Sodomy campaign would surely have been supported by many a Sunni imam
'She was a singer, a superstar, an addict, but to me, her mother, she is simply Amy'

'She was a singer, a superstar, an addict, but to me, her mother, she is simply Amy'

Exclusive extract from Janis Winehouse's poignant new memoir
Is this the role to win Cumberbatch an Oscar?

Is this the role to win Cumberbatch an Oscar?

The Imitation Game, film review
England and Roy Hodgson take a joint step towards redemption in Basel

England and Hodgson take a joint step towards redemption

Welbeck double puts England on the road to Euro 2016
Relatives fight over Vivian Maier’s rare photos

Relatives fight over Vivian Maier’s rare photos

Pictures removed from public view as courts decide ownership
‘Fashion has to be fun. It’s a big business, not a cure for cancer’

‘Fashion has to be fun. It’s a big business, not a cure for cancer’

Donatella Versace at New York Fashion Week