Miles Kington: To resign once may be considered unfortunate...

Geoff Hoon never resigned. The media took revenge on him by pretending he isn't there
Click to follow
The Independent Online

Right, Mr Blunkett. All yours!

Dear Mr Blunkett, Is resignation habit-forming? That is the second time in a year you have resigned from high office. Do you get used to it? Do you enjoy it more the second time? Will you be doing it again?

David Blunkett writes: Many cabinet ministers have been criticised for not resigning over the years. Do you remember Geoff Hoon? He was widely tipped for the push. Yet he never went, much to everyone's disappointment. Still, the media has taken their revenge on him ever since by pretending he is not there.

Dear Mr Blunkett, And is he still there?

David Blunkett writes: I have no idea. He never says much, so I am not sure what he sounds like. But the point is that if everyone gets flak for not resigning, then I should get double credit for resigning twice.

Dear Mr Blunkett, But you won't, will you?

David Blunkett writes: No. Tough.

Dear Mr Blunkett, I assume you will be having to give your official car back. Will you have to give the dog back as well?

David Blunkett writes: When you refer in that airy fashion to "the dog", I suppose you mean Sadie, my permanent companion. She has been more faithful to me than anyone else I know. She has never let me down. She would never accept my resignation. She will not drop me now that I am out of office. And she would never write a play about me and Boris Johnson.

Dear David Blunkett, Are you still seeing anything of Kimberly Quinn?

David Blunkett writes: I think that is rather an unfortunate way of putting it.

Dear David Blunkett, Oh, I am sorry - you're right. Is ... is Sadie still seeing anything of Kimberly Quinn?

David Blunkett writes: Not as far as I know.

Dear David Blunkett, It is sometimes said that the French have financial scandals and we have sex scandals. Again, it is sometimes said that the Tories have sex scandals and the Labour Party has financial scandals. One of your resigning matters was sex. The other was financial. Do you feel proud of having bridged the gap by achieving both?

David Blunkett writes: No, but it makes me wonder what kind of resignation my third one would be.

Dear David Blunkett, On a matter of principle, perhaps?

David Blunkett writes: Don't be daft. Now, let's have a proper question.

Dear David Blunkett, If you were Rebekah Wade, would you resign?

David Blunkett writes: Who is Rebecca Wade?

Dear David Blunkett, No, It's Rebekah, not Rebecca.

David Blunkett writes: Oh. Righty-ho. Who is Rebekah Wade?

Dear David Blunkett, She is the editor of The Sun and she was arrested by the police yesterday.

David Blunkett writes: What for?

Dear David Blunkett, Hitting her husband.

David Blunkett writes: Did she kill him?

Dear David Blunkett, No, but he got a thick lip.

David Blunkett writes: A THICK LIP? Is that bloody all? I wouldn't even start to think of resigning for that.

Dear David Blunkett, Now that you are unemployed, how will you safeguard your future and that of any dependents?

David Blunkett writes: I have been keeping a diary of the Blair years.

Dear David Blunkett, Is it sensational?

David Blunkett writes: It will be by the time I have finished with it.

Do you have any questions for David Blunkett? Send them along!