Deborah Ross: 'One way for teenagers to deal with their parents is to roll their eyes while fake yawning and repeating: 'Boring, boring!'

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The Independent Online

If you ask me, this is the time of year when most teenagers are asking themselves: "What on earth am I going to do with my parents during the summer holidays?" Indeed, as one teenager says: "My parents are always getting under my feet or in the way of the TV or are planning some kind of lame trip even though I keep telling them: 'Look, just stock up the house with booze and leave me to it, OK? You're always going on about how I must start to take responsibility for my life, but how am I going to do that when you won't let me get drunk, wreck the place and eat biscuits?'"

One tip for dealing with your parents is, apparently, to roll your eyes at everything they say while faking yawns and repeating: "Boring, boring, boring". "Do it enough times," another teenager says, "and they might even leave the room. It's only a temporary reprieve, but it may give you enough time to watch the second half of Top Gear without being asked: 'Do you plan on getting dressed this week? At all?' Or: 'When it started to rain, didn't it occur to you to bring the washing in?'"

Most teenagers agree that some kind of multi-activity day camp for parents might be the solution. Indeed, as another teen said: "This way, they could mix with people the same age who enjoy doing the same kinds of things, like nagging and saying they are not going to give you any money and 'What am I? A taxi?' and 'Do you want to end up washing dishes for a living?'. Also, it would mean all my friends could come over and we could just get on with faking IDs or taking pictures of our arses on our mobile phones without being interrupted or asked what we're up to, exactly."

Most kids would not only like to see such multi-activity courses for parents offered nationwide, but would also like them to come with the extra provision of an Early Riser and Late Afternoon Club, so catering for those who want to get their parents out of the house as early as they can and have them come back as late as possible. Obviously, such parents would be provided with a hot lunch and an afternoon snack to include fruit. Boarding may also be an option. It may even be ideal.