Malvern Water is in peril after almost half a millennium of refreshing royal palates. Coca-Cola has announced that it will cease production of what has been described as the purest spring water in England. But a local Herefordshire businessman, William Chase, is planning to come to the rescue.
Perhaps Mr Chase, the owner of the upmarket Tyrells Crisps, senses a golden opportunity in next year's Royal Wedding. The Queen already takes bottles of Malvern with her on overseas visits. Just imagine what could be accomplished with brand ambassadors like William and Kate.
A word of warning to Mr Chase though: he must avoid the temptation to cut corners as he attempts to do what proved beyond the ability of Coca-Cola and squeeze some value out of this product. We all remember what happened when Del and Rodney Trotter tried to break into the bottled water industry with "Peckham Spring", which came from "a natural and ancient source" (also known as a hose pipe on grandad's allotment).
Any such shenanigans with the Queen's favourite non-alcoholic tipple would surely end in a lengthy spell at Her Majesty's pleasure in the Tower of London.Reuse content