It’s Follow Friday (#ff) and if these Twitter accounts aren’t bringing a daily dose of brightness into your life already, it's time to start channeling their chirps.
This week’s must-laugh-at account is @Vice_Is_Hip, a parody account which satirises the satirical.
Like the magazine, it’s not family friendly, but steals the worst of the magazine’s sneery, staged controversy and sticks it to the people who revel in sticking it to everybody else.
The parody account also occasionally retweets posts from the real Vice account. It’s quite difficult to tell the difference. As @Vice_Is_Hip tweets 'Bang, bang, bang: Why war has never been sexier, and how we should all be joining in', the real Vice account tweets: 'Dodging shells with the friendly Syrian rebels who love football and Hitler.'
Another brilliantly conceived account spotted over the past week is @BoredElonMusk. The account charts the creative daydreams and possible inventions of the magnate investor and inventor who recently dreamed up the hyperloop.
The 42-year-old also co-founded Paypal, has a space transport company and produced his sister’s movie. He set up Tesla motors, has five children and is worth $8.8bn. He even does overachieving better than you. Again the beauty of this account is that it’s sometimes difficult to tell the difference.
Nanobot undergarments that scratch you when an itch is detected. Powerful solution for astronauts and people stuck in business meetings.— Bored Elon Musk (@BoredElonMusk) September 18, 2013
"Bump" for car crashes. When two or more vehicles crunch into each other, insurance info gets sent automatically to phones of each driver.— Bored Elon Musk (@BoredElonMusk) September 17, 2013
I'm so stressed from tonight's #BreakingBad. I may not be able to invent more than 4 things tomorrow.— Bored Elon Musk (@BoredElonMusk) September 16, 2013
We figured out how to design rocket parts just w hand movements through the air (seriously). Now need a high frame rate holograph generator.— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) August 23, 2013
From his twitter account it looks like he might be learning the violin too. Damn him. And his talent. And his inventions that might change the world.
Discovered this week was @BlokeIWorkWith, presumably set up by someone who is so incredibly frustrated by the moron he has to listen to all day he has taken online to vent his (frankly understandable) irritation. The great thing about the bloke at this guy’s work is that he appears in every office space, burping his banal chat and offering you too much information about his utterly uninformed life. Have a follow, you’ll recognise him and now you don’t need to suffer alone.
If you work in media, PR or follow a lot of journalists on Twitter I suggest following @smugjourno.
It pokes fun at the self-satisfied writer on a mission, so important they only have time to tweet about how truly significant their work is. This account mainly retweets other journalists. Their PR gripes, their irritation with other people’s spelling or grammatical errors, columnists wrinkling their nose at other columnists. That kind of thing. It’s been around a while but still only has 600 followers. Presumably because smug journos don't want their follower to followed ratio to look too desperate.
@AreaManagerGuy is a good ‘un too, an account with the biography: 'the suit says respect the salary, The name badge says I'm here to help'
Steve Steveson is one of those parodies delicious in its specificity, offering an insight into the minutiae and irritations of characters to be found in other industries. A supermarket worker, he takes retail *very* seriously. Here are some examples of his tweets.
Supervisor Neil just came into work wearing a suit! Sent him straight home. Undeserved status-uplift from him, firm management from Steve— Steve Steveson (@AreaManagerGuy) September 27, 2013
Emotional day for me as Kettering branch toilets are fitted with a Dyson Airblade. Thankfully it's powerful enough to dry my tears of pride— Steve Steveson (@AreaManagerGuy) September 25, 2013
On the rampage in Corby branch after finding a pack of Elmlea with today's expiry date. Profits slipping through my fingers, can't handle it— Steve Steveson (@AreaManagerGuy) September 21, 2013
You should also follow @TimeToChange. After Asda and Tesco were discovered selling Halloween costumes of 'mental patient fancy dress’ complete with 'psycho mask' and 'machete' this account highlighted how people who suffer from mental illness look, and often act, just like everybody else. The charity does a lot of good work. Follow them.
Lets take this moment to mourn for @horse_ebooks, the spambot that never was. RIP you nonsensical phrase dribbler.