For those who still haven't done their Christmas shopping, a few life-savers ...

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The Independent Online
As Christmas creeps ever closer, bringing with it the age-old message that if only you keep your nerve it will very soon be Boxing Day, it's time for another round of help with your Christmas gift problems. Yes, let us go bravely once more into the Independent Christmas Bazaar and see what new things are on the market this year, for the person who can't think of anything to get for the people who seem to have everything!

Australian Father Christmas outfit

As anyone who has ever dressed up as Father Christmas will testify, the costume can be death to wear - heavy, hot, scratchy and smelly. Not with a summer-style Father Xmas set of clothes from Down Under! Down there they know all about slim-line, drip-dry, non-crease summer wear, and you'll revel in the slinky freedom of your midsummer beachwear-style Santa Claus outfit! Ideal for summer fancy dress parties too! Comes in three styles: outback, barbecue, and Bondi Beach. Corks are extra. Only pounds 99.99.

Unique Magazine Subscription

A magazine subscription is always a good idea, but it's hard to think of the right magazine to send someone. All the best magazines seem to have gone out of business years ago, don't they? And that's where we come in, because we have collected complete runs of many of the best mags of the past, and can now arrange for a 12-month subscription to such classics as Lilliput, Illustrated London News, Men Only and pre-war Punch. From pounds 1,500.99 a year ...

Crossword Pyjamas

Why did nobody ever think of this before? The perfect gift for the insomniac! Yes, each pair of pyjamas has a large format crossword printed on it, so that if you wake up at night and can't drop off again, you can pit your wits against your own night wear, and tackle the clues up and down your body! And for the saucier siesta, you and your partner can both wear a pair, and explore each other's contours in a thoroughly physical yet intellectual way! Comes in three crossword shades: Concise, Moderate and Difficult. Thoroughly washable. Solutions on back. pounds 39.99.

Christmas First Aid Hamper

It's one of the perennial delights of Christmas time, the traditional hamper with its puddings and pies, its mincemeat and marrons glaces, its chocolates and cheeses! Unfortunately, this always brings ills in its train, from indigestion to heartburn, from dyspepsia to dysentery. And that's why we've assembled this special Xmas hamper stuffed, not with food, but with all the medical aids you're likely to need. Paracetamol, fizzy white powder, laxatives, and powerful purges, yes, but bandages, splints and tongue-scrapers too! A Phestive Pharmacy Phountain! Free nurse's hat comes with it. The ideal gift for the hypochondriac in your family. pounds 59.99.

Bonzai Family Tree Kit

Many people who set out to explore their own family tree give up the chase when the task seems too great, the ramifications too vast. Now, with this miniature Japanese-style family tree, you need only explore two generations, or less. Ideal for adopted people, those with revolting relations, etc etc. pounds 39.99

Vintage Television Evening

Was television really better back in the old days? No, of course it wasn't - it was rubbish, just like it is now - but for the person who keeps going on about how good it used to be, this video of an entire evening's viewing from 1959 will be the corrective needed. Includes dreary interview with Harold Macmillan, highlights of nil-nil draw between Notts County and Sheffield Wednesday, cookery programme on dumplings, documentary called Will There Ever be a Channel Tunnel?, etc, etc. Fascinating? No, but he'll never admit it! pounds 69.99. Boxed set of three.

The Xmas Files

Yes, the first book to combine the allure of the paranormal with the mystery of Christmas. In this new adventure, our X File sleuth pays a time visit to AD0. Why have they gone to AD0? Because something very strange is happening. A little baby has been born, apparently with no father. Voices appear in the sky, proclaiming his coming kingdom. Many babies are slain. Three wise men appear, then vanish. And is that a star? Or something more sinister? Gradually the Files sleuths uncover a plot emanating from somewhere else, codename Heaven, to make us all better people. Should they blow it sky high? Or turn a blind eye? This season's best-seller! Full price pounds 29.99, then mysteriously remaindered in the week after Christmas at pounds 2.99.

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