Our world has been shaken. Our deepest political convictions have been rocked. The election has barely started and yet this newspaper is gasping with shock, trembling on a shaken planet. Kenneth Clarke, whom we support as an honest man, a bad dresser and a good egg has been seen in the Commons with strange hair. A cursory glance suggests it has been blow-dried. Loath though we are even to discuss the matter in a family paper, there are those who think it has been, well, dyed.
Ken, say it isn't true. Voters need some unchanging truths to hold on to. And the Chancellor's wholly admirable slobbishness is one of them.