Meanwhile...

Some news stories of the past week that you may have missed:

Elixir of life

Researchers in Chicago have found that women who drink coffee are less likely to commit suicide than those who do not. A survey of 82,626 nurses revealed 11 suicides among coffee drinkers, compared with 21 among those who abstained. The findings have been criticised for not taking account of the fact that many people suffering from depression are advised by their doctors not to drink coffee.

PC PCs

Gay policemen in the Philippines have been urged to wear make-up at work. The mayor of Manila said he had worked with many "closet queens in uniform".

Morphin vote

A five-year-old Spanish boy, who had mistakenly been sent voting forms for the last three elections, was taken by his parents to the polling booth in protest. The boy said he would like to vote for the Power Rangers.

Tragic accident

A Hampshire man suffocated in his sleep after pushing tampons up his nose to stop himself snoring. The coroner recorded a verdict of accidental death.

With hindsight

Ange d'Ormont, a Parisian medium, has explained the troubles of the past year: "A year of 13 moons, beginning with a black moon on 1 January 1995, was bound to be an annus horribilis," she said.

Disaster enquiry disaster

A dozen people were injured and a journalist suffered a broken leg when the floor gave way in a crowded room during a meeting held to investigate a ferry disaster in the Philippines.

Occupational hazard

A baby-sitter in Dallas is suing a four-year-old and his parents, claiming that the child hit her in the throat and crushed her larynx while she was talking to his elder brother. She was unable to speak for four months and has still not regained her voice completely. One of the baby-sitter's lawyers said that the boy hit her in anger when she refused to join him in a game of checkers. "It's not like the kid just bumped into her," he explained. "This one ran across the room and popped her."

Extracting the urine

Nearly 600 delegates from 17 countries attended the first World Conference on Auto-Urine Therapy in the western Indian state of Goa. The organisers claim that drinking your own urine can cure many diseases, including Aids. The official conference poster bore a picture of a young boy urinating into a glass.

Drawing the bottom line

Three appeal court judges reserved judgment on a case involving a young lady who had asked her husband to carve his initials on her bottom with a hot knife. After looking at a photograph of the affected area, the judges expressed concern about where the line should be drawn between lawful practice and unlawful consensual assault.