VWhat must the most quoted living American do to protect his good name?
Pandora refers to the one and only Laurence Peter "Yogi" Berra, the baseball Hall of Famer and author of such immortal lines as "That place is so crowded, no one goes there any more", and "When you come to a fork in the road, take it." Yogi-isms however, are one thing, Yogasms are quote another.
The New York Yankees legend is now suing the Turner Broadcasting System channel for an advert to promote the hit series, Sex and the City.
The advert was in the form of a multiple choice question, asking whether a Yogasm was A) a type of yo-yo trick, B) sex with Yogi Berra, or C) what Samantha has with a guy from yoga class?
The answer, instantly known to anyone who has ever followed the Sex adventures of the seductive Samantha, is, of course, C.
But Yogi is not amused. He is suing TBS for $10m, claiming "severe emotional distress" at the slur to his "spotless reputation for integrity, decency and moral character". At 79 years of age, Yogi surely has a point.
No word so far from TBS, but watch this space. As the great man also once observed: "It ain't over till it's over."
Jenna's romance falls foul of mum
VI FEAR we must wave farewell to a First Daughter's romance.
Jenna Bush, left, (the blonde twin who famously stuck her tongue out at reporters while campaigning for Daddy last year) has, for months, been seen around town with the former White House aide Henry Hager, canoodling, drink in hand, at DC nightspots favoured by the rich young conservative set.
But Hager, 26, should not set his hopes too high. Jenna's mother, Laura, has put the rumours firmly in their place - and to a national TV audience to boot.
"This is not a serious boyfriend,"
the First Lady told ABC TV.
"I hate to have to be the one to say it on television. But he's a very nice young man."
Back in the fray
VWAS THE election really only three months ago - when the Vice- Presidential candidate John Edwards, left, was taking moist-eyed leave of the Democratic faithful?
Now Edwards (he of the cute, boyish, smile and the lustrous hair) has given two clear signals he's already up and running for 2008 - even though he couldn't even carry his home state in November 2004.
Last week, he took a high-profile job at his alma mater, the University of North Carolina, to promote his signature issue of moving people out of poverty into the middle class.
On Saturday night, Edwards was in (where else?) New Hampshire to address local Democratic big-wigs. In American politics, there is truly no rest for the brave.
VNOW, MORE from the great fortress of freedom that is the White House.
Bush junior may have won the election - but he is losing his chef. After 11 years toiling in the ovens at the seat of global power, Walter Scheib is quitting in order to "pursue other opportunities".
Pandora suspects the real reason is that Scheib, hailed for a contemporary style "blending regional American and ethnic tastes", simply didn't have enough to do.
The real showcases for the culinary talents of a White House chef are the state dinners - but the early-to-bed Dubya gave only four of them in his first term.
Laura promises there will be more this time around. But with this iron- disciplined, teetotalling chief executive who positively hates the frivolities of power, don't bet on it.
VFinally, sad days indeed at the third branch of the US constitution. The Supreme Court is soon likely to lose Chief Justice William Rehnquist, 80 years old and stricken by thyroid cancer.
In the meantime it's already lost its barber's shop, specialist in budget $15 (pounds 8) haircuts for America's finest legal minds.
Barber Charlie Rollins learnt he was surplus to requirements just after Christmas, as part of a cost cutting exercise.
His space, a spokeswoman said, would be used "for other purposes". But it's not quite the end of the world - the court still has a laundry and a carpenter's shop.