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The Independent Online
For me to be Minister of Food shows that the Prime Minister has a seriously good sense of humour - Nicholas Soames

What the ---- is going on? I'm not taking this ----. If that document does not ------- turn up, your job is on the ------- line, you ---- - Alan Sugar, to one of his legal advisers

It made Blue Peter look like Mastermind - Marcelle d'Argy Smith, editor of 'Cosmopolitan', after a debate sponsored by the magazine at the Oxford Union degenerated into drunkenness

The students should sit in his aura, pocket his charisma and listen to the pearls of wisdom dropping from his lips - Gyles Brandreth, MP, anticipating Ronald Reagan's subsequent speech to the Union

People will bring their eight-year-old kids, and they shouldn't . . . Carousel is all about sex and violence, the lure of rough trade - Nicholas Hytner, director of a new production of the Rodgers and Hammerstein musical at the National Theatre

I am naturally a polite person, but it is like swimming in golden syrup a lot of the time - Lord Holme on House of Lords courtesy

In strict confidence, I think we may have become too big for our boots. Journalists write more about each other today than ever before - Lord Deedes, former editor of the 'Daily Telegraph'

People occasionally tell me that I can be quite formidable and I don't like this as I don't want to put anyone at a disadvantage - Esther Rantzen

Those whom the gods would destroy they first grant the presidency of the European Council of Ministers - Mark Almond, Fellow of the Institute for European Defence and Strategic Studies

You've got to ham it up - Vanessa Palmer, a dancer with the Royal Ballet, who plays a pig in the new production of 'The Tales of Beatrix Potter'

Girlfriends aren't something I have a problem finding - Macaulay Culkin, 12-year-old millionaire film star