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Until Serbia embraces democracy, until Serbia has a government which wants to live with its neighbours in peace, Serbia will not be part of that modern Europe. You cannot expect democracies to prop up dictatorships.

Tony Blair

Who does William Hague think he is? A headmaster of a second-rate public school?

Sir Julian Critchley, former Tory MP whose views on Europe are at odds with the leader's

I have to ask myself, having looked at that video, if this is the best you can do.

Judge Richard Benson after freeing two self-confessed pornographers because he had seen stronger material on Channel 5

An Englishman can be defined as someone who lives on an island in the North Sea, governed by Scots.

Jeremy Paxman as quoted by Tory MP James Gray in the House of Commons

You can judge politicians by how they treat refugees: they do to them what they would like to do to everyone else if they could get away with it.

Labour MP Ken Livingstone, criticising the Government's new asylum policy

I could not possibly vote Conservative while William Hague still leads the party. I hope he will accept there is nothing personal in this and that it is purely on class grounds.

Auberon Waugh

I heard no sounds of celebrating at all. In fact most people were a bit down, because the Albanian national football team lost.

Jeremy Loveless, Oxfam's programme manager for Tirana, after visiting Kosovo refugees

If the present number of games continues, something is going to have to give. We will all have to take drugs to survive. Some footballers already do. I know that. But I am not giving any names.

Arsenal footballer Emmanuel Petit