Take one large grain of salt ...

Share
Related Topics
Young people often complain to me that there is no very good book on the market which will teach them how to cook.

It is all very well, they say, getting a traditional cookbook, but when the writer opens by saying there are basically four different methods of cooking (baking, frying, grilling and boiling), their hearts sink. They don't want to learn basic techniques and methodology. They want to know, on Day One, how to prepare a perfect Medallions de Venaison en Papillote.

By Day Five, they would like to throw a big dinner party.

By Day Nine, they would like to be thinking about opening a small bistro.

That's what I like about the young today. Some critics may say they are demanding instant gratification, but I don't see it that way. I think they are showing ambition, enterprise and impatience with obstacles.

On the other hand, I can see it does makes sense of a sort to learn how to cook first, so here in the Independent kitchens, we have been preparing a little instruction booklet to gratify all your demands and keep the wolf from the door.

The booklet, Power Cooking, contains all the knowledge you need to stop you starving to death.

It explains right at the beginning that there are indeed several basic techniques of preparing food.

They are not, however, the traditional ones of baking, grilling, poaching, simmering and so on.

They include such approaches as "Getting Asked Out For a Meal", "Seeing What's in the Fridge", "Going to the Takeaway", "Having an Indian", "Not Being Bothered" and "Not Feeling That Hungry Anyway".

The techniques for all these are explained in some detail. In the chapter entitled "Seeing What's in the Fridge", for example, we don't just tell you how to incorporate leftovers into a ravishing new dish. We tell you how to identify the leftovers.

For instance, it is no good finding a bowl of leftover mashed potato which you decide to use as a topping for a cottage pie or fish pie and realising too late that what you have is actually an old coconut pudding. (All is not lost - you can rename the resultant dish Thai Pie or South Seas Chowder. Renaming dishes is a creative process all of its own.)

What you must do is identify the leftover, and that is where our pictorial key comes in handy. Have you noticed most cookbooks provide a luscious series of colour photos showing what the dish will look like at the end, just as it is being served? This is no good to man or beast as a) it will probably not look like that anyway, b) visual identification of the finished product would be useful only if there were other finished products nearby that it could be confused with.

No, what you really need - and what no cookbook has ever provided - is an accurate pictorial guide to what you are likely to find in your fridge, so that you will be able instantly to pick out useful items, discard the useless and select that third great class of thing in the fridge: the item you put back into the fridge again, because it might very well come in useful at some other date for some other dish, even though you know in your heart of hearts it won't and you would be best advised to chuck it out now.

Examples of the first class (ie, things you can safely and profitably use immediately) include little bowls of grated cheese, large packets of factory-made pizza bases, bags of pre-washed salad, half-finished jars of horseradish sauce and yoghurt.

Examples of the second kind (the totally useless fridge contents) include, oddly enough, all the above: grated cheese, pizza bases, salad, etc.

It all depends on the sell-by date.

Of course, if you are really hungry, you won't worry about sell-by dates. You'll just say to yourself "How can I combine these into one tasty dish?"

The answer is always - into a pizza.

Take a pizza base, put on the cheese, the tomato from the salad bag, any meat you can find and everything else except the horseradish.

The reason the horseradish is in the fridge in the first place is because makers of things like horseradish sauce, anchovy paste, olive paste, etc, have cleverly started to put on their labels: Store in fridge after opening.

This is not because they need chilling. It is because the makers hope that once they have gained access to your fridge, you will assure their product is a vital ingredient. It isn't anything of the sort.

Millions of other great hints can be found in Power Cooking, available from me. Just send an SAE and a blank cheque. Leave the rest to me!

React Now

  • Get to the point
Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
iJobs Job Widget
iJobs General

Recruitment Genius: Senior Digital Marketing Consultant

£28000 - £45000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: A Senior Digital Marketing Cons...

Recruitment Genius: Assistant Stores Keeper

£16640 - £18500 per annum: Recruitment Genius: An Assistant Stores Keeper is r...

Recruitment Genius: Claims Administrator

£16000 - £18500 per annum: Recruitment Genius: This is an excellent opportunit...

Recruitment Genius: Software Developer - C# / ASP.NET / SQL

£17000 - £30000 per annum: Recruitment Genius: Developer required to join a bu...

Day In a Page

Read Next
Mosul falls: Talk of Iraq retaking the town, held by IS since June, is unconvincing  

Isis on the run? The US portrayal is very far from the truth

Patrick Cockburn
Photo match: Nicola Sturgeon on the balance beam on 27 April. Just like that other overnight sensation, Russian Olympian Olga Korbut, in 1972  

Election catch-up: SNP surge, Ed Balls’s giraffe noises, and Cameron’s gaffe

John Rentoul
'It was first time I had ever tasted chocolate. I kept a piece, and when Amsterdam was liberated, I gave it to the first Allied soldier I saw'

Bread from heaven

Dutch survivors thank RAF for World War II drop that saved millions
Britain will be 'run for the wealthy and powerful' if Tories retain power - Labour

How 'the Axe' helped Labour

UK will be 'run for the wealthy and powerful' if Tories retain power
Rare and exclusive video shows the horrific price paid by activists for challenging the rule of jihadist extremists in Syria

The price to be paid for challenging the rule of extremists

A revolution now 'consuming its own children'
Welcome to the world of Megagames

Welcome to the world of Megagames

300 players take part in Watch the Skies! board game in London
'Nymphomaniac' actress reveals what it was really like to star in one of the most explicit films ever

Charlotte Gainsbourg on 'Nymphomaniac'

Starring in one of the most explicit films ever
Robert Fisk in Abu Dhabi: The Emirates' out-of-sight migrant workers helping to build the dream projects of its rulers

Robert Fisk in Abu Dhabi

The Emirates' out-of-sight migrant workers helping to build the dream projects of its rulers
Vince Cable interview: Charging fees for employment tribunals was 'a very bad move'

Vince Cable exclusive interview

Charging fees for employment tribunals was 'a very bad move'
Iwan Rheon interview: Game of Thrones star returns to his Welsh roots to record debut album

Iwan Rheon is returning to his Welsh roots

Rheon is best known for his role as the Bastard of Bolton. It's gruelling playing a sadistic torturer, he tells Craig McLean, but it hasn't stopped him recording an album of Welsh psychedelia
Russell Brand's interview with Ed Miliband has got everyone talking about The Trews

Everyone is talking about The Trews

Russell Brand's 'true news' videos attract millions of viewers. But today's 'Milibrand' interview introduced his resolutely amateurish style to a whole new crowd
Morne Hardenberg interview: Cameraman for BBC's upcoming show Shark on filming the ocean's most dangerous predator

It's time for my close-up

Meet the man who films great whites for a living
Increasing numbers of homeless people in America keep their mobile phones on the streets

Homeless people keep mobile phones

A homeless person with a smartphone is a common sight in the US. And that's creating a network where the 'hobo' community can share information - and fight stigma - like never before
'Queer saint' Peter Watson left his mark on British culture by bankrolling artworld giants

'Queer saint' who bankrolled artworld giants

British culture owes a huge debt to Peter Watson, says Michael Prodger
Pushkin Prizes: Unusual exchange programme aims to bring countries together through culture

Pushkin Prizes brings countries together

Ten Scottish schoolchildren and their Russian peers attended a creative writing workshop in the Highlands this week
14 best kids' hoodies

14 best kids' hoodies

Don't get caught out by that wind on the beach. Zip them up in a lightweight top to see them through summer to autumn
Robert Fisk in Abu Dhabi: The acceptable face of the Emirates

The acceptable face of the Emirates

Has Abu Dhabi found a way to blend petrodollars with principles, asks Robert Fisk