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The Grand Budapest Hotel is on TripAdvisor, gets rave reviews

"Simply put, Gustav blew my mind."

Clarisse Loughrey
Tuesday 15 December 2015 13:27 GMT
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The film poster for the ‘Grand Budapest Hotel’
The film poster for the ‘Grand Budapest Hotel’ (Fox Searchlight Pictures/ Indian Paintbrush/Studio Babelberg/American Empirical )

It seems only right that one of Europe's finest institutions, The Grand Budapest Hotel, should receive its own TripAdvisor page. Nevermind that it's the fictitious subject of Wes Anderson's 2014 film. 

Though rumoured to be a promotional stunt lingering on from the film's DVD release, the page is awash with (accordingly twee) praise, racking up 4.5 stars with 185 reviews. The reviews are all careful to note the charm of the funicular leading to the mountain-bound establishment and the delicacies of Mendl's Patisserie; but, most importantly, there are plenty of opinions to be shared on the particulars of the hotel's famous concierge, M. Gustave. Ralph Fiennes, of course, played the discreet charmer in Anderson's picture; one who had an infamous way with the elderly female visitors. 

As MaureenD86 from Watford raved, "I am a lady in my 80s and I had the pleasure of staying in this wonderful hotel. Charming, luxurious, soothing, breathtaking... these are just some of the words I'd use to describe the concierge. Simply put, Gustav blew my mind."

Mykola C from London ran down a few of the facilities on offer, "I'm a fan of Zubrowkian culture and have stayed several times at the Palazzo Principessa, but in today's troubled economy you really need to make those Klubecks count. I figured I'd take a drop in price and see what else there was in the area. I'd heard a lot about this place, the funicular railway being something I'd always hoped to explore - though I spent a lot of time in the hotel itself.

The facilities, though requiring something of a refresh are still full of the grand charm that they must have had many moons ago. The Arabian bath was divine, fresh Mendl Courtesan au Chocolat (a particular favourite) was served in the dining area but every request I had was attended to, those bell boys were certainly well trained! If you are mulling this over, it's definitely a hard choice between this and the Chateau Luxe during high season but with majestic views of the Zubrowkan alps - you can't go far wrong here!"

Not everyone was quite such a fan, however, with a certain Dmitri D. damning the place as "an Old Ruin" stating, "Nothing special. Baths too indulgent for my taste, hotel looked like an antiquated cake. Room aesthetic borders on the tacky. The only good thing to say is that there was this charming baker girl who was a complete delight.

Ran into her very briefly in an elevator (the elevator was a bit stuffy and the operator looked like he didn't want to be there, btw, another con for this establishment). Concierge was rude and stank of cheap cologne, which gave me a headache. Lobby Boy was hard to understand." Fans will remember Dmitri to be the villain of Anderson's piece, as portrayed by Adrian Brody.

The Grand Budapest Hotel seems to be one of very few fictional locations actually hosted on the website; there's also a page set up for Dwight Schrute of The Office's own homestead turned B&B, Schrute Farms. A review from (the?) PamBeesly100 raved, The natural aroma of the beets drifts into the bedrooms and makes you dream of simpler times. The architecture reminds one of a quaint Tuscan beet farm. The Irrigation Room is simply amazing! Table making never seemed so possible. Mr. Schrute and Moes put on a great demonstration!"

Hopefully, no one will actually be fooled by this and attempt to book a holiday to the (very fictitious) Republic of Zubrowka. If they do, it can at least be assumed they'll bear witness to one of those, "still faint glimmers of civilisation left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity."

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