Ashes Diary: Lip-smacking retort by Jimmy

(AP)

James Anderson's celebration after dismissing Ryan Harris on the first day was aimed at Mitchell Johnson at the non-striker's end, but what was it that Johnson said to Anderson that had so clearly annoyed him?

For this non-lip reader, it looked something like: "Are you chirping at me because you can't get a wicket?" Understandable, then, that Anderson took such glee in taunting Johnson after knocking over Harris's castle.

Aussie press in a delightful squirm

Are you bored yet of wallowing in the Aussie media's intense discomfort at the feeble efforts of their team? No, me neither.

The Melbourne Herald-Sun went with "Kissing the Ashes goodbye" after the first day of the Perth Test while its cricket correspondent, Robert Craddock, wrote: "Australia's woes were summed up by its pathetic top order, who are either not very bright, mentally shot or put ear-muffs on whenever they are addressed by batting coach Justin Langer."

The Melbourne Age is currently running a poll: "Will you still attend the Boxing Day Test if the Ashes are lost to England?" 69 per cent of respondents have clicked "No, the cause is lost, I'm staying home."