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Why do the biggest rows always start over the smallest things?

Alison recently had an argument with her boyfriend over a ready-meal carbonara

Alison Taylor
Friday 08 January 2016 22:31 GMT
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I was trying to relay to my friend an argument I'd had with my boyfriend recently that resulted in a huge screaming row, and when I began, "So he told me he'd picked himself up a ready-meal carbonara", I realised how stupid it sounded.

The thing is, I'd called him en route from work to say I was thinking about picking up fish and chips and would he like some. That's when he told me about the selfish carbonara. I got home with the fish and chips and as he smiled hello, I gave him the death stare. "What's up?" he said. I started to tell him. You see, there was a thing before carbonara-gate.

He was on his motorbike that day and I wanted him to come and collect me from work and give me a lift home. He wanted me to walk to meet him at his work. It's not a long walk but I was thinking, why can't he just come and get me?

It ended up with me offering to get the Tube home, but the anger was simmering and the carbonara thing brought it to the boil. "Why would you just pick up a meal for one," I snapped, "and not offer to pick me up from work when you are on wheels and I'm on feet?"

"I got the carbonara because I knew we had that nice M&S pad thai in the fridge that you could have", he said. "Oh," was all I could muster. "And you offered to get the Tube…"

Then he went on about one-way systems, "nowhere safe to park", and something about Shaftsbury Avenue, all in order to justify why me walking to meet him was the better option.

And then I'm this screaming lunatic with not a toe to stand on. Even I don't know what I was annoyed about. Meanwhile he's looking at me not with anger but – worse – disappointment.

We didn't eat the fish and chips. Or the carbonara. Or the pad thai. And I'm pretty sure I'm still eating humble pie.

@lovefoolforever

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