Dead Man Walking (15)

Is there any way of stemming the flow of post-Guy Ritchie cockney crime comedies? Would, say, sticking Danny Dyer's head on a pike somewhere in Bethnal Green be enough of a deterrent? Because I for one would be willing to pay that price.

This mid-range instance of the genre, executive produced by the footballers Rio Ferdinand and Ashley Cole, stars Tamer Hassan as a notable local hard man struggling to go straight in order to take care of his crippled mother (unaccountably, Brenda Blethyn) and to keep his dominatrix girlfriend off the game. His plans are derailed when a big-time American loan-shark (a perfectly creditable performance by 50 Cent) decides to jolt his credit crunch-hit clientele into paying up by making an example: Hassan has 24 hours to raise a hundred grand, with only his wits and Danny Dyer to help. Hassan is an underpowered lead, and most of the twists – not all of them – are telegraphed a long way in advance; but I'm guessing it's all right if you like that sort of thing.