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DVD: Green Lantern (12)

Batman. Thor. Superman. Proper superhero titles. The Green Lantern sounds like a John Lewis wedding-list item. Ryan Reynolds – an actor with a permanently befuddled face, like he's intensely following a Newton's Cradle – plays Hal, a reckless fighter pilot who lucks upon an extraterrestrial green ring.

It gives him entry to a group of "intergalactic green peacekeepers", a glum bunch who uphold peace throughout the universe. Except they're nowhere to be seen when Hal has to take on a livid blob, named Parallax, keen on destroying Earth. Peter Sarsgaard, impersonating John Malkovich, plays the unhinged scientist; Blake Lively is the love interest. Dismal.