Murdoch mysteries: The great phone-hacking quiz

Fingers on the buzzer! Get ready to test your knowledge of the scandal spreading around the world. Asking the questions is Matthew Bell (answers at bottom of page)


1. Phone hacking was the work of one rogue reporter, News International told us. Which of the following preposterous excuses have also been given?

A We can't show the police our emails because they got lost in India.

B Rebekah Brooks knows nothing about hacking because she was on holiday.

C James Murdoch personally signed a £780,000 cheque for a hacking victim without knowing it was a widespread practice.

D There is no evidence of phone hacking because the Wapping office dog ate it all.

2. Enoch Powell said all politicians' careers end in failure, but is it also true of press barons? Pin the scandal on the magnate:

A Spent the pension fund before mysterious plunge to his death.

B Spent the company's money and sentenced to five years, though still maintains his innocence.

C Pioneer of the popular press, reputation tainted by enthusiastic support of Hitler.

D Closed a 168-year-old newspaper to save the chief executive, who then resigned anyway.

3. Rebekah Brooks said "there's worse to come". What could this be?

A Kate Middleton is a News International secretary working undercover in a sting operation that has got seriously out of hand.

B Rebekah Brooks is a News International secretary working undercover as a chief executive in an operation that has got seriously out of hand.

C The Great Train Robbery happened when attempts to intercept the mail of Coronation Street stars to find stories got seriously out of hand.

D News International is a wholly owned subsidiary of S.M.E.R.S.H.

4. You suspect your phone has been hacked. Do you?

A Wait for the police to inform you, though this might take five years.

B Sit tight and hope your voicemail messages weren't interesting enough to make the papers.

C Take your lead from Boris Johnson, and mysteriously say it's no big deal and you don't plan to take any action.

D Take your lead from Gordon Brown and say it's an outrage, even though you've known about it for four years and had Rebekah Brooks over for a pyjama party.

5. Fighters, not quitters. Match the quote to the limpet:

1. John Yates 2. Andy Hayman 3. James Murdoch 4. Rupert Murdoch



A "When I hear something going wrong, I insist on it being put right."



B "I can absolutely say that any hint that I am in their back pocket is unfounded."



C "If I have unwittingly misled this Committee ... then that is a matter of regret."



D "The [NOTW] made statements to Parliament without being in the full possession of the facts. This was wrong."

6. With friends like these... Rebekah Brooks has friends in high places. Which of these friends said what last week:

1. Elisabeth Murdoch 2. David Cameron 3. Rupert Murdoch 4. James Murdoch 5. Prince Al-Waleed bin Talal

A "I would have taken her resignation."

B "She's my priority."

D "She can be proud of many accomplishments as an executive."

D "She has fucked the company."

E "For sure she has to go, you bet she has to go."

7. The tide has turned against Rupert Murdoch. How do we know?

A He was turned away from the River Café.

B David Cameron hasn't let him in the back door, or even the front, of Downing Street all week.

C Vince Cable is crowing that he was right to wage war on Murdoch.

D Bryony Gordon doesn't fancy him: she described his legs being "splayed like drumsticks hewn from an anaemic battery hen".

8. Phone hacking is one of the biggest scandals in modern British history, but some of the characters seem familiar. Can you tell which News International-related figure these famous faces remind us of?

Charles II – with his tumbling locks, he ruled a hedonistic court, but his reign ended suddenly.

Young Mr Grace – old and tired, he's the frugal and absent-minded owner of the department store in Are You Being Served?

Iggle Piggle – the BBC teddy who always bounces back.

Frankie Boyle – fierce-tempered man in glasses, strongly criticised for errors of judgement but carries on regardless.

Inspector Clouseau – the blundering copper easily manipulated by darker forces.

Nicole Kidman – strong-jawed blonde Australian who doesn't suffer fools.

9. Rupert Murdoch will be questioned by a Commons select committee this week. What will he be asked?

A Do you know what day it is?

B Can you name the Prime Minister?

C Does your yacht have round-the-clock lifeguard support?

D Truth or dare?

10. The lost front pages. Just think of all the stories we won't read about, now that journalists can't hack phones to land scoops. Here we imagine what might have been:

A DAVE'S COKE SHAME

B CLEGG: I SLEPT WITH ALL 30 AT ONCE

C QUEEN KATE: I WISH I'D BEEN AN AIR HOSTESS

D HARRY FINDS GOD

Important notice: Product recall

Readers will remember the offer on our pages last week of a cut-out-and-keep "wig of invincibility", modelled on the flame tresses of the then News International chief executive Rebekah Brooks. We believed our product could protect its wearer from the sack. After all, Ms Brooks had somehow clung on after lashing up all round on the phone-hacking affair, including losing the boss a fortune as share prices crashed. However, it seems the red curls lacked the magical powers we attributed to them, as – belatedly – she had to fall on her sword anyway. Please accept our sincere (and timely) apologies.

Answers 1) All except D 2) A – 2; B – 1; C – 3; D – 4 3) B 4) A 5) A – 4; B – 2; C – 1; D – 3 6) A – 2; B – 3; C – 4; D – 1; E – 5 7) All four answers are correct 8) Charles II – Rebekah Brooks; Young Mr Grace – Rupert Murdoch; Iggle Piggle – Les Hinton; Frankie Boyle – James Murdoch; Inspector Clouseau – Andy Hayman; Nicole Kidman – Elisabeth Murdoch 9) Nobody knows

Start your day with The Independent, sign up for daily news emails
PROMOTED VIDEO
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
ebooks
ebooksA year of political gossip, levity and intrigue from the sharpest pen in Westminster
Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
Independent Dating
and  

By clicking 'Search' you
are agreeing to our
Terms of Use.

iJobs Job Widget
iJobs Media

Ashdown Group: Brand Marketing Manager - Essex - £45,000 + £5000 car allowance

£40000 - £45000 per annum + car allowance: Ashdown Group: Senior Brand Manager...

Guru Careers: .NET Developer /.NET Software Developer

£26 - 35k (DOE): Guru Careers: We are seeking a .NET Developer /.NET Software ...

Guru Careers: Graduate Marketing Analyst / Online Marketing Exec (SEO / PPC)

£18 - 24k (DOE): Guru Careers: A Graduate Marketing Analyst / Online Marketing...

Guru Careers: Technical Operations Manager

£Neg. (DOE) + Excellent Benefits: Guru Careers: We are seeking a Technical Ope...

Day In a Page

A timely reminder of the bloody anniversary we all forgot

A timely reminder of the bloody anniversary we all forgot

Who remembers that this week we enter the 150th anniversary year of the end of the American Civil War, asks Robert Fisk
Downfall of Dustin 'Screech' Diamond, the 'Saved By The Bell' star charged with bar stabbing

Scarred by the bell

The downfall of the TV star charged with bar stabbing
Why 2014 was a year of technological let-downs

Why 2014 was a year of technological let-downs

Security breaches and overhyped start-ups dominated a year in which very little changed (save the size of your phone)
Cuba's golf revolution: But will the revolutionary nation take 'bourgeois' game to its heart?

Will revolutionary Cuba take 'bourgeois' golf to its heart?

Fidel Castro ridiculed the game – but now investment in leisure resort projects is welcome
Ed Richards: Parting view of Ofcom chief. . . we hate jokes on the disabled

Ed Richards: Parting view of Ofcom chief. . . we hate jokes on the disabled

Bad language once got TV viewers irate, inciting calls to broadcasting switchboards. But now there is a worse offender, says retiring head of the media watchdog
War with Isis: The West needs more than a White Knight

The West needs more than a White Knight

Despite billions spent on weapons, the US has not been able to counter Isis's gruesome tactics, says Patrick Cockburn
Return to Helmand: Private Davey Graham recalls the day he was shot by the Taliban

'The day I was shot by the Taliban'

Private Davey Graham was shot five times during an ambush in 2007 - it was the first, controversial photograph to show the dangers our soldiers faced in Helmand province
Revealed: the best and worst airlines for delays

Revealed: the best and worst airlines for delays

Many flyers are failing to claim compensation to which they are entitled, a new survey has found
The stories that defined 2014: From the Scottish independence referendum to the Ice Bucket Challenge, our writers voice their opinions

The stories that defined 2014

From the Scottish independence referendum to the Ice Bucket Challenge, our writers voice their opinions
Stoke-on-Trent becomes first British city to be classified as 'disaster resilient' by the United Nations

Disaster looming? Now you know where to head...

Which British city has become the first to be awarded special 'resilience' status by the UN?
Finally, a diet that works: Californian pastor's wildly popular Daniel Plan has seen his congregation greatly reduced

Finally, a diet that works

Californian pastor's wildly popular Daniel Plan has seen his congregation greatly reduced
Say it with... lyrics: The power of song was never greater, according to our internet searches

Say it with... lyrics

The power of song was never greater, according to our internet searches
Professor Danielle George: On a mission to bring back the art of 'thinkering'

The joys of 'thinkering'

Professor Danielle George on why we have to nurture tomorrow's scientists today
Monique Roffey: The author on father figures, the nation's narcissism and New Year reflections

Monique Roffey interview

The author on father figures, the nation's narcissism and New Year reflections
Introducing my anti-heroes of 2014

Introducing my anti-heroes of 2014

Their outrageousness and originality makes the world a bit more interesting, says Ellen E Jones