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Arabella Weir: I can choose not to be fat. But not everyone can

Wednesday, 9 July 2008

You know that trap that famous people often fall into when they're riding high? The one when they say something phenomenally stupid because they're so blinded by their own current popularity they forget it all hangs on a thread, and that any wrong move can turn you from, say, Chris Rock into Chris Martin in the blink of a faux-pas?

For example, I'll never forget seeing that almost-sweet-he's-so-stupid village idiot Peter Andre commenting on his multi-bejellewed waistcoat in the documentary Katie and Peter: The Wedding saying to camera, "I think people like me and Katie because although we like bling we're also very classy".

From the mouths of babes. It would appear that Dave "ordinary bloke" Cameron has careered headlong into that trap too. Speaking oh so bravely out against "moral neutrality" he invites us to tell fat people that it's their fault they're porky, poor and unemployed. 'Ave that, you pikey! Get in my son! You tell 'em, Dave! Man, he's fearless, isn't he?

Here he is having a go at those who were never going to vote for him anyway and who are so disenfranchised that they're as alien to most of society as fairground freaks. Clever, eh? See what he done there?

Sure he gives a nod to social circumstances: "Where you are born – your neighbourhood, your school and the choices your parents make – have a huge impact," Cameron generously concedes "But social problems are often the consequence of the choices people make."

Doh, like, really? Like choosing to be born into a poor, woefully under-educated family to parents who didn't chose to send their kids to leading public schools. Those kinds of choices? Or maybe he means choices like not getting a job in the area you live where there's endemic, long-term unemployment?

Or, hey, maybe he means choices like being a mother who has failed to "compel the father of her children to stay", as he recently suggested was at root for the prevalence of single mothers. What on earth could he possibly know about choices apart from those available to all us with money, opportunities and privileges?

He's not entirely to blame, though. Dangling the highly seductive notion of choice wasn't his idea. It was Tony Blair's. And it was a stroke of genius. Suddenly everyone was being told that they, just like toffs, could choose – choose schools, doctors, surgeons, treatments. How do you go about choosing when you don't have the necessary tools such as education and privileges to exercise choice?

You might as well tell me I can choose to do my own plumbing. A super empowering notion, sure, particularly when I've waited three weeks for one, but without the all the equipment it's just that – a notion.

Grasping the nettle, Cameron kept wading in. "We talk about people being 'at risk of obesity' instead of talking about people who eat too much and take too little exercise." Of course you're bleeding well "at risk" if you come from the socio-economic group most likely to eat badly as a result of being less well versed in good eating habits and with the least access to shops selling quality food at reasonable prices.

Take me, for example. I'm a bit fat. Now, as Cameron suggests, I can choose not to be fat. As it happens, I actually can. I can afford a cleaning lady twice a week, and regular, reliable childcare. I have a supportive husband who organises his work to ensure he's with the kids as much as I am. I work in a well-paid industry where, in the main, I dictate the hours.

So, without any of the onerous, relentless, ordinary burdens of being a working mother I am freed up to go out running four times a week. I'm not getting any thinner but I'm definitely fitter. Mmm, Dave, I'm still a bit fat, though. Got any ideas?

Oh, while we're at it, I'd better confess to drinking more than is officially advisable for women. My fault, again, definitely. I can afford nice wine and my life isn't so without hope that I need to drown my sorrows in a bucket of Special Brew every day so we're all right, for now. Who knows where I'd be if I'd been born in Glasgow East, for example, where a man's life expectancy is 61. Try telling him and his family their circumstances are their fault.

Most pernicious, however, were Cameron's comments "that society had been too sensitive in failing to judge the behaviour of others as good or bad, right or wrong". Who among us would dare to judge a person's size, employment status and financial situation without knowing that individual's full background? Only someone stupid, vain and in hot pursuit of tab loid headlines – someone like, erm, Peter Andre or David Cameron. It's hard to decide which one of them is less in touch with reality.

Arabella Weir's next book, 'Fat Girl Confidential', is out in 2009

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Comments

41 Comments

The answer to losing weight is to stop dieting. I have yo-yo dieted all my adult life and the weight has always piled back on. In January this year I decided to stop dieting, I have since lost almost a stone in weight.

I just eat three well balanced meals a day. I cook from fresh, I snack on fresh fruit and I don't deny myself anything except too much alcohol. It's a question of balance. I have aslo tried to increase my footsteps to the recommended ten thousand a day. Not always acheivable but a few simple adjustments help. I now use the car park furthest away from the shops, not closest.

You don't have to spend hours in the gym, I don't go at all. And to ever said they can't go walking because the streets are too dangerous, they're not! That's a tabloid scaremongering myth.

Posted by Amelia | 11.07.08, 10:27 GMT

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You could do your own plumbing, love. It's not particle physics, you know.

Posted by Stan | 11.07.08, 02:35 GMT

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god...you are great and make madame orr look like the charlatan she is...

Posted by caroline | 10.07.08, 23:01 GMT

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There are plenty of fat middle-class people, and thin poor people. I don't believe it has that much to do with social class and it's probably displaying our privilege to make such assumptions. If people want to eat pies they can, if they want to eat veg it's about 40p for a bag of carrots. Veg is the food group least impacted by price increases so if anything it should be more affordable. Really I think it is our convenience driven culture that encourages people to go for ready meals and take aways.

Posted by Suzie | 10.07.08, 16:32 GMT

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I would like to think my mother was an isolated case, LS, but there is evidence that the UK is following the USA in its weight gain trends. In the USA there is a very high proportion of the population who are classed as mobidly obese and even super morbidly obese. And I fear that in a few short years it will be the same here. I know how very difficult it is for families, who often feel powerless when they see someone they love destroying not only themselvs but those around them.

If today we accept that it is okay to be 'over-weight' tomorrow we accept something a litttle bit more, and our definitions change. Because of obesity levels in children, there are already concerns that our generation will outlive the up and coming generation.

Posted by Andrea | 10.07.08, 16:04 GMT

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Andrea - your mother's weight issues and health concerns are obviously an extreme issue.
There is a difference between being morbidly obese and being overweight, wheras LMK's opinion is indicative of a lot of people who class overweight people in the same category as criminals

Posted by LS | 10.07.08, 15:57 GMT

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Lulu, I was not berating my mother, I was stating a simple fact. Morbid obesisty has a devastating effect on the health of the individual and a wider, negative effect on the family. I do have compassion, mainly for my very frail elderly father who has to try and deal with my mother's habit on a daily basis. Because that's what over-eating is, a habit, just like alcoholism or a drug addiction. And just like any other type of addict, the over-eater has no concern for anyone but themselves and their next fix. No comprehension of what they are doing to others. Have you ever met an alcoholic who felt sorry for anyone but himself? Or a junkie who had compassion for anyone but herself?

All addicts have self-pity by the bucket load, they don't really need any from anyone else.

Posted by Andrea | 10.07.08, 15:03 GMT

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People need to be held responsible for their actions. In Europe and America everyone has access to the information and resources they need to make healthier, smarter choices. Overall, I believe in the survival of the fittest and, after working as a personal trainer for nearly a decade, there should be no room in this world for the unhealthy to take. You can only give people so many opportunities to change before the excuses and blame game become so pathetic all sympathy or hope vanishes. In my opinion, unhealthy includes: overweight, anorexic, those who milk the mental health system, those who milk the welfare system, and those who are criminals, just to name a few. The human race needs to stop enabling and consuming for the betterment of all the brothers, sisters, and the land we share.

Posted by LMK | 10.07.08, 14:57 GMT

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I cannot believe the lack of humanity and sympathy in the responses to this article. If hypothetically the article was about anorexia would you all be saying shut up moaning and eat some pies? Of course not because that would be cruel and unacceptable. So why is it OK to say similar things about fat people? Why are people so cruel about this? I have seen other threads in other papers where people say fat people deserve to die and nobody bats an eyelid. The main thing needed to lose weight and be healthy is motivation which is crushed by people making comments like these. You should be ashamed of yourselves, especially those of you berating their own mothers.

Posted by Lulu | 10.07.08, 14:12 GMT

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"Oh, while we're at it, I'd better confess to drinking more than is officially advisable for women."

Maybe thats why the running isn't working too well then.

Posted by James | 10.07.08, 09:33 GMT

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