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New media give popular protest a fresh voice

When Tory advisers opened their newspapers yesterday to find a picture of George Osborne styled as the Dickensian pickpocket the Artful Dodger, they would have been forgiven for thinking that the advert was the latest attack from the Labour Party.

And The Apprentice is ... Stella

Stella English left school without any qualifications. Sixteen years later, the 31-year-old woman, who has two children, has won the sixth series of the BBC contest The Apprentice.

Dirk Gently, BBC4, Thursday<br/>The Apprentice, BBC1, Wednesday

Douglas Adams' 1980s crime caper was set in the present, but you wouldn't know it from the jokes

Last Night's TV: The Apprentice/BBC1<br />Kirstie and Phil's Perfect Christmas/Channel 4

I don't know exactly when last night's episode of The Apprentice was filmed but, as pleasant as the weather appeared to be, it wasn't a good day to be a London tourist. The remaining contestants – just six of them now – had been invited to set up rival bus tours, thus exposing the less wary foreign visitor to the full range of their incompetence, ignorance and financial rapacity. "It's like walking into a room full of knives blindfolded, not knowing how badly you're going to get cut," Stuart had said on the way to the briefing, a characterisation of his own haplessness that applied with equal force to his unsuspecting customers.

Last Night's TV: Fry and Laurie Reunited/Gold<br />The Apprentice/BBC1

A rare and sumptuous treat," promised the makers of Fry and Laurie Reunited at the beginning of Gold's celebration of a comedy double act that (unusually as these things generally go) gave rise to two very successful solo careers. And they were right, really, though you had to scrape off an astounding amount of adulatory Dream Topping and sprinkles before you got at the good stuff. Some of the gush was knowingly over the top (Emma Thompson talking of a "colossus" bestriding "this business we call show"). Some of it unnervingly seemed to be in earnest ("They're so brilliant... they're so untouchably amazing," Ben Miller). And none of it was exactly being underplayed by anyone – except for Paul Whitehouse and Charlie Higson – one-time painters and decorators to Fry and Laurie and, apparently, eventual purchasers of their first house in Dalton. "They didn't inspire us at all!" grumbled Whitehouse, mercifully giving us a break from saccharine and whipped-cream substitute.

Last Night's TV: The Apprentice/BBC1<br />Edwardian Farm/BBC2

I have to tell you I ain't putting up with him for much longer," said Lord Sugar in the very first episode of the current series of The Apprentice. He was talking about Baggs the Brand, gratingly self-regarding even by this programme's exacting standards for cocky self-love. As it turned out, though, Lord Sugar has had to put up with him for six long weeks, which may have been why he made him a project manager for last night's episode. He doesn't have any means of guaranteeing that someone ends up in the boardroom, after all, but he can at least shorten the odds a bit. Up against Baggs the Brand was Sandeesh of the Scary, Starey Eyes, the two of them competing to see who could most successfully sell novelty back-projection DVDs to London shoppers.

Last Night's TV: Edwardian Farm/BBC2<br />Ancient Worlds / BBC2<br />The Apprentice/BBC1

Did Ruth, Alex and Peter spend a brief layover in the 21st-century while in transit from Victorian to Edwardian England, I wonder? You may remember these three as the unaccountably cheerful trio of have-a-go-historians who lived for a year on Victorian Farm, spurning modern conveniences and doing everything the hard way. Now – with barely a break for rest and recuperation – they're doing something similar for the Edwardian period, pulling on the itchy underwear and setting up in Morwellham Quay, a Victorian farm and mining port on the River Tamar. Since Morwellham Quay is an open-air museum and heritage visitor centre one assumes there must be a car park somewhere, not to mention a gift shop and a café, but if so they've all been carefully excluded from the frame, the better to maintain the illusion of time travel. Our proxy Edwardians arrived in the early morning, through a haze of Tamar river mist and orchestral bombast that suggested they were passing through a portal in time.

Donald Trump jeweller set fire to his wife in an oil drum

A jeweller whose clients have included Donald Trump and Yoko Ono has been convicted of murdering his wife by incinerating her in an oil drum. Werner Lippe, 68, of Cortlandt, New York, had confessed to the killing three times, but then recanted. He stood trial in February, but the jury was unable to reach a verdict.

Last Night's TV: The Apprentice/BBC1; Buried Alive: Chilean Miners/Channel 4

The science museum," mused Jamie in The Apprentice, trying to work out what the location of their briefing might tell them about the task ahead. "It's either going to be something to do with science... or museums." He'll go a long way with a mind like that – though in the event it was neither, the venue having been chosen because it was crammed with inventions "which have made millions for those brave enough to back them". (Does the Science Museum contain an Amstrad E-m@iler? And if not, isn't it time this significant gap in their holdings was put right by some anonymous donor?) This week, both teams were being given the opportunity to play at Dragons' Den, auditioning eager inventors and selecting two products to try and sell on to retailers. They passed on the laser-light wrinkle reducer (which looked like a wearable microwave oven) and the electronic slouch preventer (it nags at you every time you slump, like a miniaturised mother) in favour of – among other things – a T-shirt with built in six-pack and a baby-grow that changed colour if the child wearing it got too hot.

Donald Trump hints at presidential ambition

US tycoon Donald Trump hinted today that he could run for the American presidency.

The City Diary: When is a loan not a loan? When it's from Cantor

Slackbelly exposes the good, the bad, and the ugly of The Square Mile

Stop Trump campaign brings up the big guns

Caroline Lucas and Body Shop philanthropist Gordon Roddick join fight against US billionaire's Scottish golf course

Business Diary: Osborne fails to lead by example

George Osborne, the Chancellor, ought to do a little more practising what he preaches. He is full of the need for austerity measures, promising billions of pounds of cuts in public spending. He expects colleagues to set an example – ministers have been told to travel using second-class train tickets whenever possible. And he has even started lecturing other countries on cuts, warning about high budget deficits around the world when he arrived at the G20 meeting of finance ministers in Korea yesterday. So how did Osborne get to Korea? By business class flight, obviously.

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Isis hostage crisis: The prisoner swap has only one purpose for the militants - recognition its Islamic State exists and that foreign nations acknowledge its power

Isis hostage crisis

The prisoner swap has only one purpose for the militants - recognition its Islamic State exists and that foreign nations acknowledge its power, says Robert Fisk
Missing salvage expert who found $50m of sunken treasure before disappearing, tracked down at last

The runaway buccaneers and the ship full of gold

Salvage expert Tommy Thompson found sunken treasure worth millions. Then he vanished... until now
Homeless Veterans appeal: ‘If you’re hard on the world you are hard on yourself’

Homeless Veterans appeal: ‘If you’re hard on the world you are hard on yourself’

Maverick artist Grayson Perry backs our campaign
Assisted Dying Bill: I want to be able to decide about my own death - I want to have control of my life

Assisted Dying Bill: 'I want control of my life'

This week the Assisted Dying Bill is debated in the Lords. Virginia Ironside, who has already made plans for her own self-deliverance, argues that it's time we allowed people a humane, compassionate death
Move over, kale - cabbage is the new rising star

Cabbage is king again

Sophie Morris banishes thoughts of soggy school dinners and turns over a new leaf
11 best winter skin treats

Give your moisturiser a helping hand: 11 best winter skin treats

Get an extra boost of nourishment from one of these hard-working products
Paul Scholes column: The more Jose Mourinho attempts to influence match officials, the more they are likely to ignore him

Paul Scholes column

The more Jose Mourinho attempts to influence match officials, the more they are likely to ignore him
Frank Warren column: No cigar, but pots of money: here come the Cubans

Frank Warren's Ringside

No cigar, but pots of money: here come the Cubans
Isis hostage crisis: Militant group stands strong as its numerous enemies fail to find a common plan to defeat it

Isis stands strong as its numerous enemies fail to find a common plan to defeat it

The jihadis are being squeezed militarily and economically, but there is no sign of an implosion, says Patrick Cockburn
Virtual reality thrusts viewers into the frontline of global events - and puts film-goers at the heart of the action

Virtual reality: Seeing is believing

Virtual reality thrusts viewers into the frontline of global events - and puts film-goers at the heart of the action
Homeless Veterans appeal: MP says Coalition ‘not doing enough’

Homeless Veterans appeal

MP says Coalition ‘not doing enough’ to help
Larry David, Steve Coogan and other comedians share stories of depression in new documentary

Comedians share stories of depression

The director of the new documentary, Kevin Pollak, tells Jessica Barrett how he got them to talk
Has The Archers lost the plot with it's spicy storylines?

Has The Archers lost the plot?

A growing number of listeners are voicing their discontent over the rural soap's spicy storylines; so loudly that even the BBC's director-general seems worried, says Simon Kelner
English Heritage adds 14 post-war office buildings to its protected lists

14 office buildings added to protected lists

Christopher Beanland explores the underrated appeal of these palaces of pen-pushing
Human skull discovery in Israel proves humans lived side-by-side with Neanderthals

Human skull discovery in Israel proves humans lived side-by-side with Neanderthals

Scientists unearthed the cranial fragments from Manot Cave in West Galilee