My top (office) tips for Mark Carney

Making your way in a new workplace is tricky, no matter how important you are

Share

Busy day ahead? Mark Carney has.

Today the new governor of the Bank of England takes up his position and all eyes will be on the Canadian official who, it’s hoped, will save us from financial ruin.

Tough gig. New country, new national bank and new office. Now, I don’t have much (diddly squat) knowledge of central banking and global economics, but I do know what it’s like to walk into a new office. Earlier this year, after spending more than a decade working in one place, I went four days a week and started going into a different office one or two days a fortnight. Armed with an arsenal of new-found knowledge, here are my tips for Mr C on his first day at the Bank of England (which I’m sure the Harvard and Oxford graduate will be agog to hear).

* Ideally you will have done a practise journey to work already. Either way, don’t arrive ridiculously early. It will frighten people. Unless that’s your intention.

* Find out where all the loos are so that a) you don’t have to keep asking and b) you can go and have a little head-clearing hide if you need to.

* Be nice to everyone. Especially important when you don’t know who anyone is.

* And however tempting it is in your first few weeks, don’t bitch about anybody in the company to anyone in the company until you’ve learned where everyone’s allegiances lie.

* Where possible (admittedly tricky in what must be a super high-security establishment), make notes about everything so you don’t look thick.

* Yes, you’ve been brought in for your insight, but no one likes a smart-ass. Don’t start every sentence with “That’s how I did it when I worked at my last place”. And don’t talk too much.

* Get the skinny on the office canteen/cafe/coffee bar. When does the soup run out? Who is the best barista? Does it take cash or do you have to load up a card with credits? All vital intel for smooth snack acquisition.

* Then get the teas in. And maybe some biscuits. Not too often, though, you don’t want people to think you’re a feeder

* Layers. A different office means a different air-conditioning system. If it’s ferocious, you’re going to want a jumper. Feeble? A shirt you’re not afraid to show off.

* Access and assess the stationery cupboard. Highlighter pens maketh the man, despite the digital revolution.

* Learn your new email and phone number off by heart. Don’t get caught out by answering the phone with “Hello Mark Carney, Bank of Canada”. (Even though you’ll probably have minions to do this.)

While all around you watch you like a hawk for signs of weakness and or failure, the most important thing to remember is, it’s just a job. Albeit one where the future of our nation is at stake. Have fun!

React Now

Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
iJobs Job Widget
iJobs General

Mobile Developer (.NET / C# / Jason / Jquery / SOA)

£40000 - £65000 per annum + bonus + benefits + OT: Ampersand Consulting LLP: M...

Humanities Teacher - Greater Manchester

£22800 - £33600 per annum: Randstad Education Manchester Secondary: The JobAt ...

Design Technology Teacher

£22800 - £33600 per annum: Randstad Education Manchester Secondary: Calling al...

Foundation Teacher

£100 - £125 per day: Randstad Education Chelmsford: EYFS Teachers - East Essex...

Day In a Page

Read Next
Critics of Fiona Woolf say she should step down amid accusations of an establishment cover-up  

Fiona Woolf resignation: As soon as she became the story, she had to leave

James Ashton
 

Letters: Electorate should be given choice on drugs policy

Independent Voices
The drugs revolution starts now as MPs agree its high time for change

The drugs revolution starts now as MPs agree its high time for change

Commons debate highlights growing cross-party consensus on softening UK drugs legislation, unchanged for 43 years
The camera is turned on tabloid editors in Richard Peppiatt's 'One Rogue Reporter'

Gotcha! The camera is turned on tabloid editors

Hugh Grant says Richard Peppiatt's 'One Rogue Reporter' documentary will highlight issues raised by Leveson
Fall of the Berlin Wall: It was thanks to Mikhail Gorbachev that this symbol of division fell

Fall of the Berlin Wall

It was thanks to Gorbachev that this symbol of division fell
Halloween 2014: What makes Ouija boards, demon dolls, and evil clowns so frightening?

What makes ouija boards and demon dolls scary?

Ouija boards, demon dolls, evil children and clowns are all classic tropes of horror, and this year’s Halloween releases feature them all. What makes them so frightening, decade after decade?
A safari in modern Britain: Rose Rouse reveals how her four-year tour of Harlesden taught her as much about the UK as it did about NW10

Rose Rouse's safari in modern Britain

Rouse decided to walk and talk with as many different people as possible in her neighbourhood of Harlesden and her experiences have been published in a new book
Welcome to my world of no smell and odd tastes: How a bike accident left one woman living with unwanted food mash-ups

'My world of no smell and odd tastes'

A head injury from a bicycle accident had the surprising effect of robbing Nell Frizzell of two of her senses

Matt Parker is proud of his square roots

The "stand-up mathematician" is using comedy nights to preach maths to big audiences
Paul Scholes column: Beating Manchester City is vital part of life at Manchester United. This is first major test for Luke Shaw, Angel Di Maria and Radamel Falcao – it’s not a game to lose

Paul Scholes column

Beating City is vital part of life at United. This is first major test for Shaw, Di Maria and Falcao – it’s not a game to lose
Frank Warren: Call me an old git, but I just can't see that there's a place for women’s boxing

Frank Warren column

Call me an old git, but I just can't see that there's a place for women’s boxing
Adrian Heath interview: Former Everton striker prepares his Orlando City side for the MLS - and having Kaka in the dressing room

Adrian Heath's American dream...

Former Everton striker prepares his Orlando City side for the MLS - and having Kaka in the dressing room
Simon Hart: Manchester City will rise again but they need to change their attitude

Manchester City will rise again but they need to change their attitude

Manuel Pellegrini’s side are too good to fail and derby allows them to start again, says Simon Hart
Isis in Syria: A general reveals the lack of communication with the US - and his country's awkward relationship with their allies-by-default

A Syrian general speaks

A senior officer of Bashar al-Assad’s regime talks to Robert Fisk about his army’s brutal struggle with Isis, in a dirty war whose challenges include widespread atrocities
‘A bit of a shock...’ Cambridge economist with Glasgow roots becomes Zambia’s acting President

‘A bit of a shock...’ Economist with Glasgow roots becomes Zambia’s acting President

Guy Scott's predecessor, Michael Sata, died in a London hospital this week after a lengthy illness
Fall of the Berlin Wall: History catches up with Erich Honecker - the East German leader who praised the Iron Curtain and claimed it prevented a Third World War

Fall of the Berlin Wall

History catches up with Erich Honecker - the East German leader who praised the Iron Curtain and claimed it prevented a Third World War
How to turn your mobile phone into easy money

Turn your mobile phone into easy money

There are 90 million unused mobiles in the UK, which would be worth £7bn if we cashed them in, says David Crookes