Biography: Harry Redknapp hates writing. Except for his own book

The QPR manager once confessed he 'couldn’t even fill a team sheet in'

The announcement on Wednesday that Queens Park Rangers manager Harry Redknapp was writing his autobiography for Ebury Press was a kipper in a barrel to the internet’s wizened galley of gagsmiths. The Independent doesn’t take much stock with farming cheap laughs at the intelligence of a man whose footballing nous has seen him rise from East End poverty to one of the longest-running careers in the world’s most fickle industries.

That said, this is the same Harry Redknapp who, while on trial for tax evasion (he was found not guilty) was heard saying at Southwark Crown Court last January that: “I don’t write. I couldn’t even fill a team sheet in.”

A recording played in court heard Redknapp explain that he couldn’t “work a computer, I don’t know what an email is, I can’t, I have never sent a fax and I’ve never even sent a text message”. A litany of accomplishments that suggest – unless he’s going to Hemingway it in on a typewriter – his ghostwriter could be a busy man until the book’s October publication. Interestingly, this is actually Harry’s second autobiography, a first appeared in 1998, not a bad run considering.

Of course Trending isn’t naive enough to expect a celebrity autobiography to be culled from months of vicious battles with writers’ block rather than a few hours’ worth of interviews with a journalist spun to novel-length, but perhaps Harry ought not to have highlighted  his literary abilities quite so fervently with a book deal on the distant horizon.

He joins Victoria Beckham in a club of non-reading, non-writing bestsellers. Beckham announced upon the launch of her own 528-page autobiography that she’d “never read a book in my life” (though later blamed it on a mistranslation). Also in that non-reading book club is Jamie Oliver who – despite selling over £130m-worth of cookbooks  – didn’t read a book until this year when he read Suzanne Collins’s Catching Fire. Oliver told The Independent Magazine that his struggles with novels were down to his dyslexia. So Harry’s in good – lucrative – company. But it might be interesting to read any mentions of his lack of writing abilities. Nobody tell him that Cognitive Dissonance doesn’t play upfront for Borussia Monchengladbach.

Arts and Entertainment

Filming to begin on two new series due to be aired on Dave from next year

TV

Arts and Entertainment
Kit Harington plays MI5 agent Will Holloway in Spooks: The Greater Good

'You can't count on anyone making it out alive'film
Arts and Entertainment
War veteran and father of Peter and Laust Thoger Jensen played by Lars Mikkelson

TVBBC hopes latest Danish import will spell success

Arts and Entertainment
Carey Mulligan in Far From The Madding Crowd
FilmCarey Mulligan’s Bathsheba would fit in better in The Hunger Games
Arts and Entertainment
Pandas-on-heat: Mary Ramsden's contribution is intended to evoke the compound the beasts smear around their habitat
Iart'm Here But You've Gone exhibition has invited artists to produce perfumes
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?
Arts and Entertainment

ebooksNow available in paperback
Arts and Entertainment

ebooks
  • Get to the point
Latest stories from i100
Have you tried new the Independent Digital Edition apps?

ES Rentals

    Independent Dating
    and  

    By clicking 'Search' you
    are agreeing to our
    Terms of Use.

    'It was first time I had ever tasted chocolate. I kept a piece, and when Amsterdam was liberated, I gave it to the first Allied soldier I saw'

    Bread from heaven

    Dutch survivors thank RAF for World War II drop that saved millions
    Britain will be 'run for the wealthy and powerful' if Tories retain power - Labour

    How 'the Axe' helped Labour

    UK will be 'run for the wealthy and powerful' if Tories retain power
    Rare and exclusive video shows the horrific price paid by activists for challenging the rule of jihadist extremists in Syria

    The price to be paid for challenging the rule of extremists

    A revolution now 'consuming its own children'
    Welcome to the world of Megagames

    Welcome to the world of Megagames

    300 players take part in Watch the Skies! board game in London
    'Nymphomaniac' actress reveals what it was really like to star in one of the most explicit films ever

    Charlotte Gainsbourg on 'Nymphomaniac'

    Starring in one of the most explicit films ever
    Robert Fisk in Abu Dhabi: The Emirates' out-of-sight migrant workers helping to build the dream projects of its rulers

    Robert Fisk in Abu Dhabi

    The Emirates' out-of-sight migrant workers helping to build the dream projects of its rulers
    Vince Cable interview: Charging fees for employment tribunals was 'a very bad move'

    Vince Cable exclusive interview

    Charging fees for employment tribunals was 'a very bad move'
    Iwan Rheon interview: Game of Thrones star returns to his Welsh roots to record debut album

    Iwan Rheon is returning to his Welsh roots

    Rheon is best known for his role as the Bastard of Bolton. It's gruelling playing a sadistic torturer, he tells Craig McLean, but it hasn't stopped him recording an album of Welsh psychedelia
    Russell Brand's interview with Ed Miliband has got everyone talking about The Trews

    Everyone is talking about The Trews

    Russell Brand's 'true news' videos attract millions of viewers. But today's 'Milibrand' interview introduced his resolutely amateurish style to a whole new crowd
    Morne Hardenberg interview: Cameraman for BBC's upcoming show Shark on filming the ocean's most dangerous predator

    It's time for my close-up

    Meet the man who films great whites for a living
    Increasing numbers of homeless people in America keep their mobile phones on the streets

    Homeless people keep mobile phones

    A homeless person with a smartphone is a common sight in the US. And that's creating a network where the 'hobo' community can share information - and fight stigma - like never before
    'Queer saint' Peter Watson left his mark on British culture by bankrolling artworld giants

    'Queer saint' who bankrolled artworld giants

    British culture owes a huge debt to Peter Watson, says Michael Prodger
    Pushkin Prizes: Unusual exchange programme aims to bring countries together through culture

    Pushkin Prizes brings countries together

    Ten Scottish schoolchildren and their Russian peers attended a creative writing workshop in the Highlands this week
    14 best kids' hoodies

    14 best kids' hoodies

    Don't get caught out by that wind on the beach. Zip them up in a lightweight top to see them through summer to autumn
    Robert Fisk in Abu Dhabi: The acceptable face of the Emirates

    The acceptable face of the Emirates

    Has Abu Dhabi found a way to blend petrodollars with principles, asks Robert Fisk