Cosmetic surgery : LETTER

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The Independent Culture
Barbara Follett's political make-overing ("The red brigade", 28 January) conjures up a whole range of seriously unsexy Emily-style cosmetics. Lipsticks, for example, could carry such loaded appellations as "Cherie" or "Jail Bird" ("For putting them in their right place"), with an ironic "Pretty Poll" for guying the militant tendency. For political partying, "Party Girl" would obviously be heavily featured on aspirant lips. With a more "finished" look coming back into fashion, the candidates could unprettily dissemble under a "second thick skin" of Teint Rose "Block" foundation. Committee rooms would then be filled not so much with smoke as with ambitious clouds of "Number 10" ("Flaunt it"), brazen "Fillybuster" or an intimidatory "Attitude". Not to be marginalised, male candidates could loyally stand their ground with bodies and faces tingling with "Pour Bambi". Once elected, the perfectly made-over members of both sexes could then take the battle right into the enemy's camp by dousing themselves liberally with a pungently challenging "La Question".

nigel gowland

London N6